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    ladybug48 posted an update 6 years, 1 month ago

    I got out of the hospital Monday afternoon. Tuesday morning I was woken up by my mom because my step brother was missing. Turns out he had taken off between 10pm and midnight the night before and went to his mother’s (who does NOT have custody and has not played an active role in any of my step brothers lives in the last few years). Since he is…[Read more]

    Mood : Worried
    • @ladybug48/ damn that is indeed a hard situation!!
      Just do your best to support your mother and your siblings, trying to not take sides (which can be hard).
      I wish you all the best and also wish that your younger brother manages to get help and overcome those suicidal thoughts.

    • Do your best to support your brother and family during these tough times @ladybug48, let him know you are there to help and be a compassionate shoulder for him to lean on, everything will be OK, remember you are a wonderful and loving sister, inbox me anytime if you want to chat or vent, stay strong, you are never alone :) (hugs)

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    ladybug48 posted an update 6 years, 1 month ago

    I won’t be on much; I’m currently spending the night in the ER waiting for a bed in the psych unit. Not suicidal or anything, my therapist’s were concerned about me since I haven’t gotten out of bed or eaten in a week. The people here are concerned about my “quality of life” so they are emergency admitting me. I can’t leave if if I wanted.…[Read more]

    Mood : Afraid
    • Please eat and take care of yourself @ladybug48, do stay healthy and look after yourself physically, mentally and emotionally, everything will be OK, I’m sure you will find a bed somewhere that is closer to your home, please know you are a wonderful mother who will beat all her struggles and come out stronger, keep fighting and never give up, you…[Read more]

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    ladybug48 posted an update 6 years, 1 month ago

    This site needs an app. It has been way too long since I posted, but I am not a fan of using websites on mobile devices. I have not had a very good year and I seem to be regressing right now. I had a meltdown after therapy yesterday. Thankfully my mom was able to talk me through it, but I’m still feeling horrible. Of course it doesn’t help that…[Read more]

    Mood : Drained
    • I’m so sorry that you are going through a difficult time @ladybug48, do take care of yourself and your family, it’s good to see that you are in therapy along with your family, do find people to talk too who will support and help you through hard moments, you are a wonderful person who deserves happiness along with everyone you love and care…[Read more]

    • hey I agree but I would try Vent -it’s an app similar to this, but there can be some drama I hear.

    • I completely agree ms ladybugg. I’ve thought that since I joined. I am only now returning cuz my last 5! Phones and their interfaces made it impossible

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    ladybug48 changed their profile picture 6 years, 1 month ago

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    ladybug48 posted an update 7 years, 10 months ago

    My grandma died a week after we saw her. It’s been hard comprehending all of the finality that it brings, but I’m doing ok I think.
    Last night I had a really bad night. My anxiety was bad and my depression was bad. I was able to get to sleep finally, but then I had a horrible dream which involved my grandma, so I didn’t actually get much sleep…[Read more]

    Mood : Neutral
    • I’m so sorry for your loss @ladybug48, do your best to remember all the happy times you had with your Grandma, you will make it through this, remember to relax and take care of yourself as well, we are all here for you on Blah, feel free to message me anytime if you need to chat, my inbox is always open, stay strong (hugs)

    • I’m sorry. You will get through this, I wish nothing but positivity and happiness upon you!
      and R.I.P to your grandma. ♥♥
      try to be happy, for her.

    • @ladybug48 I’m so sorry for your lost. I don’t think there’s any words someone can say that can relieve the pain. However try to think of the happy moments you and your family lived with her. She would like that I think.
      I wish you all the happiness in this world and that with time your pain starts to go away,
      And if you ever need someone to…[Read more]

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    ladybug48 posted an update 7 years, 12 months ago

    We found out in November that my grandma had stage 4, non-operable cancer in her liver, lungs, and lymph nodes. She started chemo as the doctors said it was slow growing. About 2 months ago we found out it had moved into her brain. They started radiation right away. I got the call today that they found a second hole in her lung that they can’t do…[Read more]

    Mood : Anxious
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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years ago

    So much has been going on. And I tried to do the vent thing but no matter how many times I try it, I am not happy with it.
    On Wednesday I had my last two wisdom teeth out. It wasn’t supposed to happen until next Thursday, but they called on Tuesday and moved it up. One was in a kind of tricky spot so I needed to know put out and I got…[Read more]

    Mood : Drained
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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 3 months ago

    My mother and I don’t get along. If I keep things fake and cheery on the surface of our relationship then we are fine. But if anything, and I really do mean anything, goes deeper than nail polish we start to have problems. And with the other issues with life, we are fine, but only if I keep my mouth shut and just go with what she says or what…[Read more]

    Mood : Frustrated
    • Hi, @ladybug48! If you don’t mind me saying, it’s obvious she’s very conscious of her own feelings, but not other people’s. I’m not sure how you’d get around that situation, but just think of what’s best for you and your child. There’s no saying what could happen in the future, but try your absolute best to think of the positives in that…[Read more]

    • Try to talk to your mother about things if you can @ladybug48, be as honest and as open to her, she shouldn’t be horrible towards you, you deserve love and care, I want to see you being supported and valued by those closest to you, your mother should tell you how special you and your child are to her, hope things work out, I’m always here if you…[Read more]

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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 3 months ago

    What do you do when you don’t have the energy it requires to maintain a relationship with someone anymore? Friendship or otherwise. When it has become more exhausting and more work to be friends with these people, than the enjoyment you once got from their time and company. Do you know if it’s just the depression playing with your mind and body?…[Read more]

    Mood : Exhausted
    • If a relationship makes you feel down or exhausts you, I would do your best to move on and focus on things that will uplift you and that will make you feel happy @ladybug48, you deserve a life that is filled with positivity, I’m sure things will work out, you will make things better for yourself, try to be upbeat and keep going, you will be OK,…[Read more]

    • @ladybug48 You can just take some time off it, see how it goes, no need to make long term decisions, make sure you have your support network ready (someone who is not the person who makes you exhausted) in case you are actually isolating yourself and you need assistance.

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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 3 months ago

    My grandma has been diagnosed with stage 4 inoperable cancer in her lung, liver, and lymph nodes. Cancer is a cold and heartless bitch.

    Mood : Numb
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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 5 months ago

    A really good friend of mine stopped talking to me a few days ago. It hurts not having that outlet, but at this point I am used to people leaving.
    A crush from high school and I have started talking and hanging out again. It’s fun and easy. Very comfortable. But a part of me is holding back because I feel as though he hasn’t quite grown up…[Read more]

    Mood : Hurt
    • I understand how it feels to have friend problems but see if their having some personal problems that their possibly not telling anyone right now. Far as your crush, give it a chance but proceed with caution and just be prepared that things may not work out since you said yourself he’s probably not “future material” just have much fun as…[Read more]

    • Anyone who leaves you isn’t worth it @ladybug48, you deserve to be surrounded by kind and lovely people who will always stick by you, I would try to remain friends with your crush for now and see what happens, everyone deserves good people around them, you do too, do try to take some time to focus on yourself, you can do it, I’m sure things will…[Read more]

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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 5 months ago

    So much has happened in this past week. One thing happened and then everything just snowballed from there. I’m so done with it all that I just want to stay in bed and not respond to any texts I get.

    Mood : Numb
    • Please don’t let anything get you down @ladybug48, I want to see you feeling good, things may seem difficult but they will change for the better, focus on all the wonderful things in your life, everything will be OK and things will work out, try to not let the negatives beat you, great things will happen to you and you will overcome, show…[Read more]

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    ladybug48 posted a new activity comment 8 years, 5 months ago

    In reply to: Christina (: posted an update There is this new thing on Facebook, and it’s that ’on this day’ and however many years ago it shows a memory or whatever… and I saw something I didn’t want to. Can I just have a […] View

    I agree that the On This Day feature doesnt always post what you want to see. Some things are in the past for a reason and hurt when you are reminded of them. It is very hard to relive them. I’m sorry it happened to you.

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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 5 months ago

    I recently reconnected with an old flame whom I haven’t seen in 8 years. I’ve known him 12. We have quite a history. We never actually were in a relationship as it seemed our timing was always wrong. He just recently ended his marriage (2 months ago). We agree we both still have feelings for each other but he says he isn’t ready for anything…[Read more]

    Mood : Lonely
    • Please don’t feel lonely @ladybug48, you will find your soulmate, that special someone is out there waiting for you, you will meet your knight in shining armour hun, everyone deserves true love in their lives, you do too, a wonderful partner will come into your life, be positive and keep smiling, you can do it, I’m always here if you need to…[Read more]

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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 5 months ago

    I live with my mom and step dad right now. It has definitely not been easy as we have a difficult relationship but with the help of some meds it has worked. Well, for the first time since we moved in, last night I slept somewhere else and it was wonderful. I didn’t have to put up with any of her normal crap. None of it! So coming home today I was…[Read more]

    Mood : Infuriated
    • I’m sure you will find a place where you can feel comfortable and happy @ladybug48, don’t let your mother be mean to you, she should treat you with love, care and kindness, she should support you and always be there for you no matter what, do your best to focus on the things that make you feel good and that put a smile on your face, you can do…[Read more]

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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 5 months ago

    After having been on the increased meds for awhile, my mother came to me and told me how much she has noticed a difference and how she thinks I am doing so much better than I was. I still feel like I have a long ways to go until I’m on level ground but it’s so nice to hear that the medicine is working after having gone through so many different…[Read more]

    Mood : Accomplished
    • I’m so proud of you :) You’re getting better, step by step, and you’re being awesome at it. Even your mum saw it. You should be very proud of yourself! :D

    • Glad to see you are doing better @ladybug48, hold your head up high and keep going, you are a fighter sweetie, I’m sure things will continue to go wonderfully for you, I’m always here if you need to chat, message me anytime if you want, my inbox is always open, stay strong, you are never alone :) (hugs)

    • That’s great to hear! I’m glad you’re getting better. :)

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    ladybug48 replied to the forum topic Social Anxiety at work in the group Group logoSocial Anxiety 8 years, 6 months ago

    I definitely think you should look into what your insurance will cover therapy-wise. My therapist has helped me tremendously when it comes to my anxiety. Though I am not able to work due to my anxiety problems, […]

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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 6 months ago

    It’s so strange how you can be surrounded by people, your family, and still feel so incredibly alone.

    Mood : Alone
    • Please don’t feel alone @ladybug48, you are surrounded by compassionate and lovely people hun, also you are amongst friends in this community, we are all here to support you, try to do things that make you feel happy and that put a bright smile on your face, you can do it, I want you feeling amazing and on top of the world, everything will go…[Read more]

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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 6 months ago

    I wish there was a pill out there that could make you numb. I can’t remember the last time I was happy. I’ve laughed, sure, but I haven’t been happy in a long time. I’m tired of being an emotional mess and feeling all the pain and hurt. I don’t want to feel anymore. If I’m going to be pretending to be fine and go through the motions anyway,…[Read more]

    Mood : Exhausted
    • Everyone deserves true happiness in their lives @ladybug48, you do too, you can and will make it through tough times, so many more better and brighter days are ahead for you, focus on the things that put a smile on your face and that make you feel content, hold your head up high and be as upbeat as you can, I want to see you feeling awesome and on…[Read more]

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    ladybug48 posted an update 8 years, 7 months ago

    At the end of my rope. Not sure how much more I can take.

    Mood : Depressed
    • Need someone to talk to? My inbox is always open if you ever need help

    • Please don’t let anything get you down @ladybug48, you are such a wonderful individual who deserves to feel truly amazing, everything will be OK and things will work out, hold your head up high and smile, you are a warrior who will overcome, focus on all the good things in your life, show everyone how truly incredible you are, be kind and sweet…[Read more]

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