NOAH. said 3 years, 3 months ago:

So I kinda have a rant/advice request sorta thing that I’d like to put out there to all y’all… Umm, here goes.

So, I’m 16 years old, and I’ve sorta only ever liked this one girl. We’ve been best friends our whole lives, and I’ve had a massive crush on her since I was like 8. Lately we don’t talk as much anymore, and I know we’re drifting apart. We go to different schools, and I just never really see her anymore, but I’m still totally crazy about her, and I’m starting to think it’s crossed over into something unhealthy. I’ve been losing sleep over this every night for several years, it’s starting to affect my ability to function normally…. I just… I really want to go for it with this girl, more than anything in the world. She’s beautiful, smart, ambitious, sweet, and I honestly think we could make a totally awesome couple. However, because this crush has sorta become an unhealthy obsession, with several addictive/self-desctructive behaviors developing as a result, I’m wondering if it might be better to just try to move on.

Anyway, sorry if that sounds really emo or whatever, but yeah, any advice on this would be *massively* appreciated.

Maddie .x said 3 years, 3 months ago:

Hi. I’m nothing expert here and in fact this is my first response. I’ve ever been in the slightly the same situation with you. I’ve always been crazy about a guy for five and a half years. But now I get over him, simply cause we didn’t meet each other starting from the second year of this crazy crush-ing and he doesn’t even know me (he was my senior).
But you are her best friend, and that leads to a statement that you know her deeply. It’s kinda tough to just let go. Drifting apart sucks as fuck but you need to understand that some people aren’t meant to stay in your life forever. People came to shape you, to teach you, to strengthen you, and to support you. Everyone’s going to leave, sooner or later.
I think the worst thing about your case is the fact that this whole situation brings you to a ‘self-destructive’ state. YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY.
And to reach that happy life, I think there are two choices:
You go all out and try to get her no matter what it takes (considering she’s your best friend so far, I think she’d understand that sometimes friendship could turn into relationship).
Or, to let go. It’s gonna take years, probably. Try to look for new people, new girl, and new interest (hobbies, activities, environments) to distract your attention. Join some school activities and get your life stuffed up with crazy-ass schedules cause busy is the new happy. Don’t live in the past. It was what it was, maybe you and her weren’t meant to be together (even though you thought you both would make a perfect couple).
That’s it, I hope it kinda helps you a bit? if you wanna ask you can always send me message.
Don’t forget to be happy!
Cheers :)

NOAH. said 2 years, 9 months ago:

Oh my gosh @bluntviews I just saw that someone had actually replied to my questiony thingy! I know it’s 6 months late, but THANK YOU SO MUCH! I really appreciate that someone out there was willing to take the time to respond and help me out with my wacky teen angstyness. You rock, dude!!

Status update- Literally like 2 days after I posted this, I found out she had a boyfriend, and as a result I decided to go with trying to move on. It’s a pretty slow and painful process to be honest, but I think I’ll be much better off for it in the end.

Sandman said 2 years, 8 months ago:

You still chasing that girl? Or have you moved on? Can you give me a status update home slice

NOAH. said 2 years, 8 months ago:

I wish I could say I’ve moved on, but unfortunately I haven’t done it quite yet… 9 years is a long time, ya know? I think I’m managing well enough, so I’m just trying not to rush it or anything.

Steve J said 1 year, 8 months ago:

Bandaid off slow, or bandaid off fast. Always the choice. Same with getting into cold water. Pros and. Ons to both. My experiences is quick to pull off, but pause before looking for a new one.