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    Vena posted an update 7 years, 8 months ago

    I’m having trouble asking my parents for antidepressants. I’m going away for two weeks so I’m planning on asking my mom when I get back. I thought things were getting better, I was being really productive, I was working, drawing, worrying, making money, I wasn’t musing on how my suicide would go. But recently, I’ve been filled with so much stress and anxiety, i haven’t been able to go a day without thinking about how much I want to kill myself. I haven’t even brung myself to talk about the things I’m going through. I just feel so awful all the time, I want to relax and feel better but I feel like I’m wasting time and I can’t relax because all I can think about is how much I haven’t been doing anything, I haven’t written anything in ages, I haven’t draw things for weeks. I just hate everything right now. I hate feeling this way, I want to get help but telling my family about my suicidal thoughts only resulted in my mom casually using ’depressed’ as a mood meaning sad, my siblings constantly fighting and saying how I’m ungrateful, stupid, don’t realize how good I have it, over reacting, too sensitive, seriously, when I try to call them out on their abusive behavior they laugh at me.
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      Oli replied 7 years, 8 months ago

      Let your family know in a calm way that you want help and that getting better is your goal @masquerader000, they really should be supportive and not be horrible to you, do your best to focus on getting yourself to a good place mentally and emotionally Vena, try your absolute best to stay positive and keep going forward, you can do it, I’m always here if you need to chat or vent, message me anytime, my inbox is always open, stay strong, you are never alone :) (hugs)