tbird1335 said 9 years, 10 months ago:

im scarred from the five and a half years of cutting myself at least twice a day. im scared that i will never stop. in the last year ive only done it maybe three times all together but ive actually been happy. now my depression is coming back and so are my urges. im terrified ill give in because i have a niece now and what if she sees those scars and thinks its ok to that to herself? and my boyfriend has said if i do it again he will break up with me because he just doesnt understand that that will only make it so much worse. i need help, before its too late…

fark said 9 years, 10 months ago:

You need to find another way to channel your emotions. Have you tried working out? Pain from a good work out is far more rewarding than creating permanent scars on yourself.

Go for sweat – not blood. You’ll be healthier too.

dwat said 9 years, 10 months ago:

I agree with what @fark said. Working out, running, lifting weights etc. is a good way to channel those bad emotions. Also if you get the urge to cause pain to yourself and you feel you’re about to do it, try wearing a rubber band on your wrist and snap it. It gets rid of those urges and doesn’t cause any physical harm.

Elys said 9 years, 10 months ago:

I first need to ask, does anyone else know about this? Have you told a parent, teacher councilor, etc.? There are treatments for depression that help you so much. I know because I self harm as well. I’m not saying you’ll be cured, but you really need to talk to someone and get help.

calb said 9 years, 10 months ago:

My therapist told me that I should make a list of 10 things I have to do before I’m allowed to self harm, like call a friend or go for a run or something, maybe you should try that.

Deleted User said 9 years, 10 months ago:

Cutting is a way of getting control when life seems like it’s out of control. As you cut you control the pain you go through, on your own terms, and your brain releases endorphins when you do, helping make it addictive.

The first thing to remember is that cutting doesn’t help you, period. It’s an addiction that does nothing but make things worse. It seems like an easy way to take control of something in your life, but really you only make it so much harder.

When your niece asks about those scars, you tell her those scars are a war that you won, and that you don’t want her to ever have to go through it. Scars are a reminder of something that hurt us, we all have them, but the thing to do is remember that you healed from that wound. It healed and new skin grew over it, just like when we clean up those areas of our life, we grow happy again.

Generally if we’re are unhappy with our life there’s a reason for it. Look at your life, why aren’t you happy anymore? What is taking you out of your good moods? What’s making life hard for you when it shouldn’t be? That’s the thing you need to remove.

Remember depression is an illness, and if you think it’s serious you should seek help, but if you don’t think it’s gone that far, then remember thinking those thoughts is a choice. A choice that you are in control of. You’re strong, you’ve made it this far, you bear the scars of your past, but that doesn’t mean your stuck there. You’ve made it this far, don’t give up, don’t let that weak part of yourself come back.

If your boyfriend leaves you instead of trying to help and understand you, then I’m afraid to tell you, you’re better off. If he doesn’t do his best to understand you and try to help you through this and your other problems, then he’s not the right guy for you. Don’t settle for someone. When you’re in a relationship you should always have each others best interests at heart, and if one of you doesn’t, then it’s not really a relationship anymore is it? It’s one person living how they want while they string the other along.

Don’t give up, exercise instead, find an outlet, take control of your life, and isolate the things that bring that depression back and get rid of them. We’re all at war tbird, but that doesn’t mean we have to lose.