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(◣_◢)Poet said 9 years, 9 months ago:

This topic will be for anyone willing to share entries from their journal. Today while cleaning up i found an old journal of mine and began reading it. I found it interesting to read my feelings from a time in which i thought i would never move on from or how my perspective has altered since these entries, but prior to reading the old entries i hadn’t remembered feeling in such ways.

Reading through an old entry can help to create a clearer perspective in the present; perhaps you’re going through a tough time and don’t recall the strength you had yesterday or you’re struggling with writers block and past writing can re-ignite your creative flow.

Share for yourself and not to receive comments or attention, yet to provide your perspective to others, so that when in our darkest hours, should one find their way to this topic, may the perspective of these entries provide others with clues to understanding their own self.

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(◣_◢)Poet said 9 years, 9 months ago:

August/12
”I couldn’t find the moon last night. i looked everywhere, it was no where to be found. The stars we’re there, shining with glee, with me beneath, walking dead, within the dark, heavy heart weighed down by a Sleeping Paw.”

October/12
“Where do i go, where do i start? i feel broken, roots faded, withered away, stale is the heart, weak is the mind, and he spirit hidden. i am hollow. i am not flawless, but neither was she, yet i loved her as if she were, no projections of disappointment from me, just my best to balance the chaos within and the war around me. im in a void within my mind and heart, choosing to only surround themselves with all i’d wish to avoid. Not feeling very black, nothing infinite about me, no possibilities, nothing and nothing even more. i never want to love again, for the heart can’t be trusted. i feel like i can’t breath, no foundation beneath me, but i’m not flying, no wings to carry me, no sky to kiss, this misery i won’t miss, but it missed me, so its company i keep, no wind, no push, weak knees, death via memories, i don’t regret ever having loved her.”

I remember feeling pretty bad during this time, amazing how time changes so much. The oddest part is me feeling hurt in this, almost in agony yet today i’d be to ashamed to let myself feel this way, instead i’d harden up and do something to bury the feelings. Hmm.

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