Deleted User said 11 years, 1 month ago:
So a little about the undesirable part of me, I’m very argumentative, I have this “need” to always be right, even if I’m wrong, I’m sure you known at least a few of these kind of people in your lives. Well coming here I can tell you how much I think it is wrong of me to be that kind of person, but for some damn reason I can’t help it. I love to argue, and sometimes, I like to argue just to get someone upset, on top of all of that, I’m very opinionated, and I always have to prove how much my opinion is better than the other person’s opinion. I’ve come to this realization that its probably the root of of WHY I lose friends left and right, on top of that, I’ve gotten very professional at being cold. I can literally shut someone off and be over it in less than a few days. When people stop talking to me, I don’t question them as to why they did it, I just shrug it off and move on. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a very genuine loving person, and very caring, but for some reason there is just that side of me that can just be cold and inconsiderate. I know everyone can be that way, but I think it over comes me more than what it should, to the point that I literally have no friends, and the one person I guess you can call my friend isn’t someone I can talk to because she doesn’t listen, the one time I tried talking to her over the phone she was paying attention more to the tv and laughing at what she was watching. I’m always the one to listen to everyone else, and maybe over the years, subconsciously I grew tired of it, and just started shutting people off and just sticking with myself, idk. I know how very confusing all of this may sound, but something is definitely wrong, I just wish I knew exactly what it was so I could improve it. I don’t have to have a whole bunch of friends, I can be good with just a couple, but I wish I just had that ONE person I could just come and talk to anytime I felt like it, or anytime I’m having trouble, or feeling down or whatever, honestly, I’ve never really had that, even when I was in a relationship. I just need a friend I guess.
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