Why can’t I take new/potential relationships slow?

I am a 43 year old, soon to be divorced woman who is trying to get back into the dating scene after 25 years with the same man. I find myself stumbling through what the expectations are from men in my age group. If try to play it cool and act like I couldn’t care what happens, they seem to lose interest. But then if I am too enthusiastic, they think I’m too clingy. It seems that I can’t find a middle ground. And then there are times when they say and do all the right things, I get caught up in the passion of “newness” of it all, end up sleeping with them and then, well…we all know where that usually leads – nowhere. Can someone…a guy in my age group maybe, tell me what the rules are? I feel as clueless as I did in high school! Any feedback would be appreciated.

Category: Dating & Relationships asked April 8, 2014

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K to the A

1 Answer

I personally heard this same kind of story from the male perspective, recently!
Male expectations are all over the dating spectrum. Some are looking for a relationship, some are looking to score. Some are looking to take it slow, some take an engagement ring to a first date (seriously).
Not surprisingly, women's expectations are all over the dating spectrum as well! Ask yourself, "what do you expect?" A fun evening? A friend? A new boyfriend? A new husband? You should probably make your expectations in that order. And don't adjust your behavior based on what you think the guy expects. Be yourself! Have fun! Take your time! You don't need to rush back into this. As you become more familiar with yourself as a single person you will become more comfortable with yourself in the dating spectrum.

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BillsBrother

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