Why can’t I get my wife to drop her walls and open up?

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I will try to make this brief. If you look up prude in the dictionary, you’ll find the definition of my wife. Married less than two years, 1st marriage for her, 3rd for me. She is (way) less sexually experienced than me. We are both in our early 40′s. I have had to deal with missionary style every single time. She is not adventurous. She is VERY hairy down there and I can’t stand it. I have offered to do role play, shave her, different positions, oral, different places, like nothing works. If you want more specific info, just contact me. Otherwise, I am just at my wit’s end and feel like getting a woman on the side for a purely sexual relationship only.

Category: asked April 22, 2015

4 Answers

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Didn't you guys talk before the marriage? It is your 3rd marriage, any chance that maybe your problem is that you jump into serious relationships with unreal expectations?
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In a relationship you in my opinion , your body belongs to your partner , you make your body presentable for your partner. Keep your body on the best it can be. I tend to be a bit more dominant when it comes to sexual activity. With the shaving problem , maybe she feels comfortable , especially since you are married that she doesn't have too. You should tell her how you feel about that. Maybe she's scared. Make her feel good about her body. complement her , but also let her know the way you like her body the most. Tell her your opinion. Defiantly DO NOT get another girl. That's kinda f*cked up. So don't. If you want details on how to please her and make her open up. Give me a message privately. You don't have to take this into consideration. But I think I can help you out.
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To answer some of the above, no I have never pressured her and continue to encourage her in the way she looks with positive reinforcement. I know there are emotions attached but I like the fact that another pointed out that you are supposed to keep yourself pleasing to your partner so they don't lose interest. As far as me, I'm open-minded to anything if it's a turn-on. I shave my chest and I shave down there so I'm not that hairy. I keep in shape with cardio and strength training. I've bought books, videos, toys, games, etc. from the adult stores and nothing works. She places them in a drawer and doesn't even try!
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Maybe you don't make her feel connected to you in any other way. Prepare a lovely dinner for both with flowers and wine. Enjoy your time together talking about your relationship and get her to open up with you at her pace. Ask what she wants and go from there. She is inexperienced ad may feel a bit intimidated that you are so experienced and she's not. Be patient and think twice before finding another woman because you knew what you were getting yourself into before you got married. And if you didn't know what you were getting yourself into then you might have rushed into marriage.