I hope you are able and willing to help me. I am a 19 year old girl from New Jersey, I moved to Utah with my family as a teenager and hated it there, none of my relationships lasted I was unhappy and my life was unfulfilled. Last December my family took a vacation on a cruise to Mexico. On there I met this incredible man. He was from Budapest, Hungary and worked on the ship as a magician. He was everything I could ever dream of. We stayed in contact and had a few visits and nice presents, his contract ended and he decided to come to Utah to stay with me and my family for 6 weeks. When he left we were still so in love but he had to return to Hungary to finish his last semester of college for his Bachelor’s degree. I was so in love and blind that I followed him to Europe to live and start my life here. I am very young and have never been away from home before so I was in for a complete culture shock. The first month went fine, we didn’t fight to much, he was very kind and patient with me, but after the second month we began fighting a lot and things got very bad for a while. I couldn’t do anything. I didn’t know the language, the pubic transportation, the city, the people and culture. So i decided to take things into my own hands. I started a language course to occupy my time while he was in school. I got a couple part time jobs teaching English to college students that were writing there thesis. I made a couple friends to go out with and slowly became more happy and content with my life there. But the fighting continued… We were drifting apart but still there was so much passion and love for one another. I had developed an anxiety disorder around him and any time we fought I would literally feel like someone was smothering me with a pillow. I tried many many things to improve the relationship. Clean, do nice things for him, say nice things, do things together, buy him presents, anything i could think of to try and make him happy and could improve our relationship. I became so sad and depressed that i began to hate everything, the city, the people, the language, his family, him, and eventually myself as well. I would just sit and cry and cry or hours. I didn’t how to make anything better. I turned to my family and told them the things that had been going on. They were more than willing to help me. My mother sent me some medications to try and help with the anxiety and depression so I could start getting my life back on track and be happy again. That was the only goal in my mind. He was trying to help me in anyway possible and i was doing great till last week i just started crying and had a horrible panic attack, I couldn’t breath, I couldn’t talk, I couldn’t control my emotions. He suggested that we spend a little time apart so he could focus on school and work and wouldn’t have to worry about me. I moved to his mothers house for a week and then we had our first meeting after the panic attack. All week long he sent me encouraging sweet love messages. They made me feel good that he supported me on my trying to recover. We met at a local Starbucks to talk and everything went great but at the end he got a look on his face and told me that everything was over. That I couldn’t go back home with him and that I needed to move out of his moms house by next week. I begged him not to do this and that we can work through our problems and its only temporary but he insisted that he did not want to be with me and not to call or text him anymore. I am so heartbroken and lost. I came to this city for him and now am completely abandoned with nothing. I have absolutely nothing but what i came here with. No money, friends, him, family, reliable job, and happiness. I am so lost and need some help on how to pick up the pieces. Please please help. Alora
