My roommate/best friend and I had an interesting relationship. When I first met him, I fell for him SO hard, I had never felt that way about anyone and haven’t since, I was head-over-heels CRAZY about him. BUT I gave up that feeling because 1, I knew it wouldn’t last 2, He liked me a lot, but it wasn’t the same for him. So this is where the best friend part started. I know it sounds like I was just in love with him and settling for what I could get, but it wasn’t like that. We made great friends. He dated, I dated, and we were very close and talked about all of it openly.
And then he met the girl that made him a different person.
This is the girl that makes him feel like I did about him when we first met. The one who made him act like a hormonal teenager, the one who blinded him to the fact that he was acting pathetically desperate and not like himself.
Now don’t get me wrong, I’m happy that he met someone who gave him that feeling!! It’s a wonderful way to feel, such a rush. But it has ruined our friendship! All he talks about is her, he’s obsessed, “Kate texted me this, what does it mean?” “Did you see that car? It looked like her car, I’m going to call her and ask if she is in the area.” etc.. ALL THE TIME
Here’s the hard part: I feel kind of abandoned because I gave up a very similar feeling so we could have a great friendship, but he gave up our friendship so he could have that feeling for another person.
He has no delusions about it being a lasting or even healthy relationship with her, and I know it would break his heart if he lost me because of her, but I didn’t make the cut, and it made me realize that not even our friendship was as important to him as it was to me. I can’t get over it, and I’ve told him all of this. I can’t bring myself to talk to him about it anymore, I don’t want to put him in a position where he feels like he has to break it off with her but I can’t even look at him anymore. I stay away from the house when I know he’s there, I go out of town every weekend, and I just want to move out and never look back. I think he broke my heart, or something, I don’t know, but I can’t stand the thought of him telling me he’s sorry and he doesn’t want to lose me, so I avoid him at all costs now.
So would it be totally childish to just move out, get myself out of there?
I don’t know what to do.
