ok i am depressed,really depressed i really don’t know how to start so i will just get to the bottom of this thing… men SCARE me (no offense guys, i am sorry) it’s just that i think they are so abusive and they can hurt me if they ever get angry i always imagine them in a scary way and the problem is that men are everywhere so basically i can’t escape from my fear how can i deal with this issue? …help
Not all men are abusive and angry all the time, some of them wouldnt even hurt a fly. Its true that there are some that indeed do abuse though, thats no secret. Its hard to get rid of a fear but sometimes you have to get out of your comfort zone and make friends with one of them. You never know they might even become your best friend, just keep in mind that there are sensitive and sweet men in the world too.
So I checked your profile to get a better idea of why you feel the way you do... I get it. That being said though... Let's consider all the males you've interacted without throughout your life. So if you're 19 and you interacted with a new male person once a day for all of your life that would mean 19 x 365 = 6935 different males you've come in contact with since birth. And that number is probably on the low side. So out of nearly 7000, 1 has hurt you. Now it was a pretty big hurt and I'm not trying to down play it but... instead of focusing on the one guy that hurt you... consider the 6999 others that didn't. Instead of focusing on the one negative... consider some of the good.
Guys, Stop telling her that 'not all men are like that' I'm pretty sure she knows! But she was hurt and abused and now is going through some trauma (unless i misread the situation). No, not all men are like that, but enough are that she is scared. Suggesting immersion therapy (just talk to a guy, you might like him) is entirely inappropriate.
Depression, I have never been in your situation, so I am unable to offer experienced advice. I suppose I would recommend talking to a male friend you already have about your fears (unless you think he'll respond like the well-meaning jerks above). Another idea is to find a female-only abuse survivor support group. Unfortunately, I think this problem is only going to fade with time, but finding a good support structure will hopefully speed it along.
One year ago I got harassed while taking the bus home and I have been fearful of men for some time. I avoided going out as much as possible. Everything settled down when I met a very nice guy and I realized, not all men are the same. Actually, only uncivilized men would hurt other living beings. Men with no future that most likely no one would want around them.
While Auri is right - your fear is irrational... it's because all fear is. Fear is an irrational emotional response to a stimuli. I do think that if you expose yourself to nice people, male and female, over time you'll find that your fear will start to go away. Work slow, trust is something that has to be built up over time.
I hope that you understand that your fear is completely irrational. Every person is different and there are tons of type of men. I was also scared of men until I understud that men are not all agressive and abusive, maybe a small percentage are, but there are really good and peaceful men out there and it's not fair on them to be generalised as dangerous because of a few inhuman men that exist on earth, not all of them are rotten inside. I'm guessing your fear comes from past experiences or something along those lines, but those type of men in your mind aren't even close to what an actual average man really is believe me. I learnt to think of people in general rather than men and women as two different worlds, there are very femenine men and very manly women so my conclusion is that we have different "stuff" in our body, but that's the only major difference. I hope it helped a bit :) you can talk to me if you want more detail of how I overcame my fear for men, it is too long to post in a answer.
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