Is it weird to feel so furious and jealous because I don’t get many likes on facebook?

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Ok so, almost all of us have facebook, instagram and other social media accounts, but does it really count if you get a lot of likes on a picture,status update etc? Does it really defy you as a person physically or spiritually? Because sometimes I really envy people (especially my closest friends) who have a lot of likers in their social media accounts, especially both facebook and instagram. I don’t understand why I’m so affected because I only get a few likes or sometimes nothing when im posting something. Is it because im not that physically attractive or not that famous? When I tried to ask my friends on how they get a lot of likes on their newly updated profile pictures that usually gets up to a 100+, they said they don’t really know, and they were shocked to see the results of how many people liked their pictures even though those people that liked it, have no close relationship with my friends. So can somebody explain to me why?

Category: Tags: asked April 10, 2014

3 Answers

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accepted
Yes, it's not normal. While I understand your admiration for their social capital, being angry and frustrated about it is a symptom of an underlying issue that is bothering you, and it's probably easier to address than taking a course on marketing and personal brands to manipulate and inflate your audience. Your friends have just probably a number of close friends/followers that kick-start the liking and attract positive results, but if you think about what really bothers you about it (example: do you want more attention from one person? or, do you feel your creative efforts are ignored? or, do you have problems bonding with people?), you will be maybe able to find a better way to satisfy that need.
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If you're looking for an answer as to why you get jealous and infuriated when you don't get likes, the answer is fairly simply from a sociological perspective. Our society is focused around two things: money and technology. This means, our sense of self worth is often dependent on a variant of the two. We use social media, via technology, for multitudes of reasons, but the two biggest purposes it serves is to be in constant connections with your social circle, as well as validate your self-worth. We perceive our self-worth as better when we get likes, and phenomenally horrible if we don't get any likes. If we look at someone who always gets likes on their photos, we think, what does this person have that I don't? Am I not as pretty? Am I not as popular? Am I not good enough? And this concept of "likes" can trigger either validated or defeated feelings within us, especially those of us who are particularly insecure about ourselves and our self-image. In a world controlled by technology, it's impossible for an "average" human to feel attractive when distorted bodies are presented as the standard for beautiful thanks to photo shop and media. This is another reason why we feel validated with a "like".
You are not alone in your feelings. It is actually fairly common, even if it makes us feel silly for getting pissed over a like. The only way to get over this is to really that this IS a social construction, and you can be better than that. In realizing that the number of "likes" in NO WAY correlates the worth of a person, you can free yourself of these negative feelings. A like on a photo could mean a multitude of things, but just because you don't get "x" amount of likes has absolutely no meanings. do not be the person that fishes for compliments or attention on social media, or uses provocative photos to get likes. You may feel nice and validated for a little while, but this is NOT a healthy way to strengthen your self-worth, it only proves how insecure you are.
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I agree that sometimes people show terrible things on Instagram. But in this case I do not see anything special. Sometimes a usual story can be blown like a balloon for nothing. I think the whole situation was much exaggerated. I love this Web Site and always report abusive content if I occasionally come across such posts. But in this case, I purely do not understand the reaction.