Is he worth it?

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I used to be dating this guy until he cheated on me. In his defense I had been away for a month and we hadn’t seen each other in forever. Now it’s been a couple months and I still really like him, and he still really likes me. He wants to get back together, but I don’t know if I’m mentally able to get into a relationship and the cheating thing still bothers me. I’m just not ready for a commitment but I miss him like crazy. What should I tell him?

Category: asked October 8, 2013

4 Answers

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accepted
Nope, do not get back together with him. That would basically communicate to him that he could get away with cheating if he just gives you a good enough excuse. I tried forgiving someone for cheating, and then later I found out he was talking to other girls behind my back.
You'll never be able to trust him the same way again, and that will always be an area of your relationship where you will hold resentment and pain. I imagine anytime you two are apart for significant periods of time you'll always feel a little uneasy. Besides what you probably miss is just the ideal of your relationship, because the reality was clearly not very good. Don't take him back because he was good to you, or made you laugh, or fun to hang out with sometimes. He cheated on you which means he didn't even respect you enough to break things off so he could do whatever he wanted without hurting you.
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V
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No, he isn't worth it. There's no excuse for cheating on someone and you shouldn't even defend him on that. Not seeing someone physically no matter how long is absolutely no excuse. If you feel he has changed, try being good friends for a while, or just dating, not making it a full on relationship or making any commitments. Honesty is the first policy and if he can't be honest not in a relationship, that's your cue.
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Sadly enough, once a cheater is always a cheater. It is tempting to give him chance since you still like him but you must be firm on this issue and tell yourself you deserve better.
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you are a beautiful wonderful person, and you will always deserve better, more than that, there will be many people out there for you, and although he says he likes you, who's to say that once he's got you he'll do the same thing again, you don't want to be missing out on other people because you're with a cheater. you're a beautiful person with a beautiful future ahead of you, don't get tied down with someone that doesn't see how beautiful you really are.