The father and I aren’t together first of all, but we are slowly getting back together and I’m confident we will. I’m 7 months pregnant now and I’ve have anxiety lately about giving birth. I’m not afraid of the pain, I’m afraid of the little things about labor people don’t tell you about. First of all I’m incredibly scared of having my legs open in front of doctors but if they’re all female I’ll be fine in that aspect. The hospital I have to give birth at is a learning hospital and it’s the only one for miles so it’s very possible people could film or be brought in to watch my birth. That’s keeping me awake at night too. I could possibly urinate or defecate while giving birth which is a big one that’s bothering me. I’m scared 1: to do that in front of the father, seeing as it’s embarrassing and I’d hate for him to be disgusted with me or something. 2: Because my mom pretty much invited herself in the delivery room with me and she’s a blabbermouth. If I do lose control of my bowels during birth she’ll either tell someone and embarrass me with no regard for MY feelings OR she’ll tell me and continually remind me of it with no regard for my feelings. If I made her promise not to tell me in case I do and don’t feel it or tell anyone she would just do it anyway! My mother is not one you can trust with things like that. These things terrify me and I don’t know exactly what answer I want to hear. I know I can’t just tell my mother she can’t be in the delivery room, it’s her first grand child and when I told her once she cried so I caved in and said fine. I’m just so afraid.
EDIT: The father situation I have under control now. I’m going to have a long talk with him about what could possibly happen and what to expect and not to tell me if I DO anything like that.
the mother situation is STILL an issue. She is really bad with keeping my personal information to herself. I get she’s proud but she really doesn’t respect that it bothers me.
