i don’t know if i have an eating disorder i’m confused

You should talk to your doctor about this and see if you can start seeing a therapist and/or a nutritionist. You're heading down a dangerous and deadly path. Get help sooner rather than later. Please.
I could go on a whole spiel about how being fat isn't a bad thing, eating is necessary and fuel for your body, every body shape and size is beautiful and we just need to stop judging and comparing because it's not our place. But if you're already having disordered thoughts, it won't do much.
So just please, if you don't misery, stomach and intestine problems, heart problems, and a long list of other health problems associated with an eating disorder, get help.

Any disordered thoughts and behaviours, no matter how "small" or "unimportant" are issues that you need to address. These can lead to years of disordered thinking and harmful behaviours that can destroy your body if left unattended to. My advice is to seek out help early on so you don't end up infertile, with the bones of a 50 year old or even dead.If you'd like to talk about this, feel free to message me.

It sounds to me that you probably do have an ED, but you should definitely talk to a professional about it first. Help isn't hard to get, if only you ask for it.