Bipolar II diagnosis (August 2013) and ED (2010-2012ish). When I was hospitalised I was on Zoloft (SSRI antidepressant at the time). At admittance, I was started on Seroquel (antipsychotic with mood-stabilising and sedating features) and after a couple of days, Lithium. I started to improve and was out after a few weeks, but we are tweaking the meds reasonably often. I was started on lamotrigine a couple of months ago to improve stabilisation, alertness and help combat weight-gain. I genuinely do not think I'd be alive right now without these medications. And if I was, it would be a count down waiting to happen. My doctor said this to my mum the day he wanted me hospitalised (whether is was voluntary or not). Do these urges come in waves? Are they clustered around similar times/days/activities? No one is happy with my stabilisation yet. The last couple of weeks for me have involved blatant disregard of the whole university obligations thing, my parents confiscating my car, me being left with $1.20 in my bank (because obviously spending money on chocolate and concealer is important. As in $400 worth in a fortnight). These waves come and go and I'm becoming better at recognising them. I'm better at not getting in my car, because if I'm up or down, that trip to the shops can become a 7 hour day trip. I'm either binging or starving, buying clothes I will never wear with money I don't have, or I can just sit and stare. I can't read, sit down or concentrate. The thought of leaving the house was terrifying. A lot of people with bipolar don't respond particularly well to SSRI antidepressants. My hospitalistion occurred a couple of months after my (former) psychiatrist increased the Zoloft from 100 -> 150mg. I currently take 200mg per day, but it works in with the addition of the mood stabilisers. You and I will probably spend far too much of our lives jumping between medications, trying to find something that not only keeps us alive, but doesn't turn us into a miserable zombie. The factors that influence the effects of these medications are not held constant over our lives. Sometimes being kept alive is the best possible outcome for a little while. If you'd said that to me 3 months ago I'd probably start crying and considered punching you in the mouth. But, unfortunately it is true. I keep an eye on a few different online communities that connect people with bipolar and other illnesses. I keep an eye on information about my medications and those that have been mentioned as possibilities to me by doctors. I try to get as much information around me as I can, because in all honesty, the medical community has so much to learn about treating bipolar disorder, not to mention the plethora of other mental illnesses. All of our symptoms vary. All of our reactions to side-effects vary. All the timing, phases and triggers of our illness vary from individual to individual. I'm really glad to hear that you're feeling the best you have in a while, it can be so hard to remember the way you "were" when things are going ok. Your medications seem appropriate to me and appear to be influencing your life positively. Try to keep open lines of communication between yourself and your psychiatrist. Schedule appointments in advance, so you know you always have a check in point. Does your psychiatrist have a good system in place for emergencies? My GP is in close contact with my psychiatrist so if I'm not able to get in with the psych, my GP's doors are open and he can handle changes to medication and recommendations, plus advocate on your behalf for any communications with a hospital if necessary. A therapist/psychologist would probably be a valuable addition (if you haven't got one already) to your care team. A psychologist can typically see you more often and at shorter notice than a psychiatrist, so crisis care or stressful periods can be dealt with in a timely and safe manner. A psychologist to talk to about these general issues is important too. Your psychiatrist might be more focused on treating the symptoms of bipolar disorder, but a psychologist/therapist can look at what happens beyond that. What can make you happy? Your mind has had a rough time and it can be difficult to recover an accurate picture of the world around you when you haven't been able to trust your own mind for a while. Meds won't make that go away, go talk-therapy can help. It can also help about the impulse control, if you're seeing your therapist once a week or fortnight or whatever, it's a lot easier to remember what to talk about and how it made you feel. It also helps you to apply any strategies you're given to try really quickly, and to check up to see if they're going well. Sorry about the mess of typing that's another impulse thing of mine... verbal (written?) diarrhea. If you have any questions or something was unclear, feel free to message me. 16 is young to be diagnosed but hopefully starting to tackle it early will help you in the long run. Well done for getting this far!