Sometimes the brain is a really shitty place to be. Sometimes it feels better to be in pain than to have to deal with all the crap the mind throws at you when you least need it. However, we both know that it does not really work that way. Yes the brain gives you a high; a release of different chemicals that give you a sense of relief. But then your way of thought returns and the mental stuff hurts just a little more while the physical a little less. Much like the way chemical drugs work, you will always need to increase the dose to achieve the same effect. This means that not dealing with the problem will end up killing you. And that sucks!I never got to the point of inflicting serious physical pain on my body; my speciality was, and to some extent still is, the dark mental self depressing internal monologues that can rage on for hours and days. As I do not know you at all, and you do not provide much detail about why you feel the way you do I can only try to put in words what works for me, at least sometimes.When I am in motion I do not want to die. I do not want to feel pain when I move. For me it's that easy. Running, lifting weights, getting a little into parkour, doing some weird ass stretching/yoga stuff in my room. Using your body at the healthy side of the limit of what it can handle feels very good. The brain releases the same chemicals as when you use it on the other side (cutting, hitting etc, yourself), but for every time you have to escalate the intensity, your body gets stronger. And the point is that it gives me the time to either just not think about the things that hurt, or other times, when I feel particularly strong, I can use my mind to deal with the difficult stuff while exercising.Attending the olympic games is about physical skill, moving and exercising the body is not. For me, the brain get's some time off when my body is doing things a bit on it's own.I do not tell you this because I know it helps. I tell you this because I know it helps me right now. If you would like to talk to me more specifically or whatever, just send me a message.I hope this helps at least a bit! The brain messed us up in the first place, but there are ways to use it to our advantage, so that the hurt goes away! :-)Jonas
