How do I become better?

I'm in the same boat as you although I'm younger. I suffer with family loss, death, depression and a certain diagnosis. If you ever want to talk about it, I feel like we can both help each other and learn to overcome this together.

This might sound weak because I've not been through all the things you have but read. A lot. If ever you find you're not doing anything just read. The news, a novel, Kants philosophy, anything you can. Over time, it really builds up and I don't know, things click into place. Good luck and hang in there ok :)

You dont have to get 'better' for anybody. If you want to get a job, get one! If you see flaws in yourself that mean that your hurting others, improve them! Being bullied and being diagnosed arent things that you can help, but you don't need to. They're not flaws, they're experiences and differences.You haven't actually listed any flaws, only unfortunate situations and things that make you you. There's nothing wrong with you, you're the person that can change your life simply by believing that. Good luck.<3(If you ever want to talk, I'm always free.)