As somebody who has struggled with depression, let me begin by saying that killing yourself should not be your first, second, third, or even last option. Your life is not defined by this girl, even if you're in love with her. Love is hard. We go into relationships understanding that love is hard, and when someone plays with our feelings, sometimes it's difficult to confront that and say "Hey look, if you really loved me, you would have never done this to me." If she wants to be with someone else, turn your head away from her. She isn't the one for you. You are worth more than that. I'm not going to tell you to ignore it, because that would be impossible. In fact, I'm sure your tears will keep streaming. Just remember that crying is perfectly acceptable! Something bad happened, and you have reacted. But please, PLEASE do not let this define you. You are someone who is made of thousands upon thousands of attributes. You have likes, dislikes, prejudice, acceptance. You are someone of your own -- you don't need another person to define you, so don't let them. Don't let her win. Don't do that to yourself. If she doesn't want to be with you, realize it is her loss, and find someone who does. Why? Because you are worth it, that's why. Above all, though, you need to be the one to consciously make the decision. If it's difficult to approach her, wait. Remind yourself every step of the way that you are a human being, that you are tender-hearted, and that you can accomplish difficult tasks. I have faith that you will make it, and that you will be okay, so long as you put your mind to it. If and or when you do decide to approach this, just keep in mind that every step of the way, someone else has faced this to. You do not have to carry this burden alone.