Help me get over loneliness :)


I am a PhD student in theoretical computer science. And I love the mathematical sciences. It’s not that I don’t like other, simpler things like art, but it’s just that because of the nature of what I want to achieve, I do not get the time for these other things. I wish I did. But I don’t.

The result is that – I get lonely. Not because I don’t have friends. I do have friends. And I am lucky to have them.

I have this weird feeling to be genuinely appreciated for being me. I wish I were in a relationship. And I think I feel lonely, cuz everyone just views me as just someone to solve their math problems, since I don’t get time for any artistic activities. And it’s not anyone’s fault here. I mean, I am not blaming anyone for this. But it’s just the way it is. And I need to get over these thoughts.

Category: asked July 7, 2015

3 Answers

hey there trier. Loneliness is something which at some point of time troubles all of us.We have all the good things by our side but still we feel that something is missing in our life and it is sad phase. The feeling which you keep getting which is to be appreciated for being you is not at all a weird feeling :) i feel that to remove this loneliness first of all you gotta remove some time for yourself from your tight schedule. You gotta plan this nice trip somewhere with your friends or anyone so that you can go out with them and spend some quality time :).So the first thing is go out to some really awesome place which makes you feel good about yourself.Let it be anything you like but do take a friend with you and then you guys can cherish all your memories which will really remove loneliness from your mind at least for some time. You help everyone in mathematics which is a really good thing and i believe that helping others is one of the best available way to remove your loneliness :). Do not worry and just be happy since being happy and keeping your mind and soul fresh will enable you to smile all the time which will eventually reduce your loneliness. You should be glad that you are able to help so many of your friends in solving their math problems since helping someone is really great deed. Hangout a bit with your self and your friends and see how things change.Learn to know yourself better and i bet that you will feel better and more fresh. Socialize a bit more :).I know your schedule does not allow you to do that but do try.It will really help to reduce your loneliness and make you more happy :). take care and goodluck :)
Hi. Once in a while let your brain rest from Science and Math and do something recreational with your friends or family. There's no growth if you just lock yourself in a box. You need to go out and have fun. Experience stuff that you haven't tried before. Go camping, or hiking. Hang-out with your friends and maybe you can ask them to find you a blind date (isn't that a good idea?? :D) just so you get to meet other people. :D
I've been in exactly your situation. I've got a lot of different aspects of my personality. I'm a nerd, I'm a partier, I'm a collector of crazy experiences, I'm caring and supportive, I'm insanely driven and ambitious, I'm emotionally damaged as all hell. People tend to pick one or two of these and focus on it, and never find out about the rest. I also feel like none of them actually appreciate the entirety of who I am. Like they're friends with only a fraction of me, so it's not really much of a friendship. They also aren't really inclined to listen when you're ready to give more of yourself. I totally sympathize with your position. If you want to talk about it with me, I'd be happy to.