Do you really need family?

Hello,

I have pretty well disowned 99% of my mothers side of my family. They are parasitic and abusive. My fathers side of the family is very small now numbering 8 of us. I have however been unofficially adopted, a couple times, into a pretty large family. Now these adopted families are just as much family to me as I am to them. Like any family we have some bad apples but so much better than my biological family. I have no regrets about detaching myself from my biological mothers side of the family and it has been at least 16 years.

Family is still important to me but the relationship should be bidirectionally positive for the most part... else it maybe time to find a new family!

Your Family is indeed important, but as persons- do you consider them friends? It's understandable to dislike your family, but the love you have for them will always be there. I suggest you cope with your family, because even if they don't show it, somewhere in their hearts they'd be heart-broken if you were to disappear.

I think you do need family, despite how they behave or how much they annoy you ect. They would be heart broken if you were to disappear or something bad were to happen to you, and even though you may not think it, your family will always love you no matter what, even if they don't act like it

I don't think you need family. Not at all. People say 'blood is thicker than water' but the full saying is actually 'the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb' - the bonds you choose to build with others are sometimes closer than family bonds. Family are people you're genetically related to, but it doesn't mean they can't be horrible people. And if your family is horrible and toxic and maintaining contact with them is harming you physically and/or emotionally? Do NOT be afraid to cut them out of your life. Is it good to have supportive family that can back you up if you're in a bad spot? Yeah. But not all families are good families, and not all people in families are good people, and you should never be afraid or ashamed of cutting people out of your life who make things hard on you, no matter what your relationship with them is. Family is not entitled to unconditional love and respect - they are people like any other people and not all people are deserving of your specific love and respect. You are under no obligation to love/respect/keep contact with someone who treats you poorly or is damaging to you mentally or physically even if they are family. You can get on just fine without them.

When two people get married, it's assumed they don't share a blood relation, yet they are most certainly family. When people adopt, they open their hearts to people with whom they don't share any relation, yet they are also family. Family comes in many stripes. We don't have the luxury of choosing those we share blood with, but family is more than blood. Yes, absolutely you need family. It sounds like you just haven't been able to find or put together that family yet. The blood relations will only get away with what you are willing to allow them. If they are coming to you for help, then you get to set the extent and conditions by which you will help them. If they don't like that, they are free to go elsewhere, because your family and you will have better things to worry about.