Dealing with a break up..?

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There’s this boy I’ve been dating for a little over 9 months, and my parents don’t really like him because of, physical appearance and things that I CHOSE to do with him. They think that he’s trying to pressure me into something when in reality he’s never asked once, I’ve always just done things when I felt comfortable enough to do them. My parents think he’s going to “hit it and quit it” but I refuse to break up with him because of what they think. I’m not really ashamed of it or even regret the things we’ve done together except for the fact that a few days ago he got mad and broke up with me because his friend said told him I cheated on him. And now I’m afraid that if we don’t go back out or if I don’t make him believe that I didn’t (because I actually didn’t, honest to god) that he’ll tell everyone what we did. This has happened before where we’ve broken up and gotten right back together but it’s been almost a day or two that I haven’t talked to him and normally we only don’t talk for a few hours at most. I really need help trying to get him back or at least talk to him. But I don’t wanna sound desperate or clingy because I’m really not. I just don’t wanna screw up my rep.

Category: Tags: asked October 30, 2013

2 Answers

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Well if you didn't cheat, then his friend is responsible for you two breaking up and if I were you I would want to know why his "friend" would try to hurt him and you by making up lies like that. Maybe he's threatened by your relationship with your boyfriend? Maybe he had feelings for you at some point and is sick of seeing you with your bf? Maybe he's just repeating gossip he heard or maybe he's an asshole! Either way, your boyfriend didn't even give you a chance to explain or defend yourself? I think that's also kind of shifty.
If my boyfriend dumped me over a rumor, I wouldn't want to take him back. At any point someone could just make up another lie and he's out the door. If you do want him back, you should email or text him and explain that what his friend told him isn't true. You don't know where the rumor came from but that's all it is. If he chooses to believe it then he's letting you go because of a lie, and if he's comfortable with that then you can respect that. But he needs to consider that all it took was for someone to tell him a story and he threw away a perfectly good relationship without even considering if someone could be trying to hurt you. He also needs to consider why his friend would do something like that to him. Also, let him know that if he would be willing to talk, you'd like to discuss the issue in person, but only if he can listen with an open mind.
Even though you still have feelings for him, it would be difficult to take him back because there's clearly a lack of trust and there might never be a good amount of trust depending on his personality. I hope this helps at least a bit. Good luck!
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V
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Best thing to do is act like it doesn't phase you. This will pique his curiosity and more than likely start the communication between you back up. If it doesn't... then you're better off without him. (I know that isn't what you want to hear, but you'll be happier with someone that treats you better and in accordance to the standards you have set for yourself).