Confused about friends?


I have a girl I know who I used to be really close with. We were pretty much best friends for about 7 years or so, and in January that all ended. She started saying I was a liar, an awful person, that I ruined her life, that I made her miserable, that I was “never a true friend”, and that she regretted ever meeting me. She has yet to apologize and we haven’t really spoken since, but I’ve seen her around and she has my Tumblr from finding it off of a submission post on a mutual blog we followed.

I blocked her on Tumblr a couple of months before our big “fight” because she would use the posts against me, in a sense. My blog is a bit.. depressing, and it very openly talks about how I feel, so it tends to show if I’m doing okay or not okay at the time. Instead of trying to help me herself, she’d send her boyfriend to do it (he happened to message me about 10 minutes after every time I posted a personal post or anything). I got tired of it, so I blocked her.

Starting in probably March, two months after her verbally attacking me, she started messaging me on Tumblr on anonymous with messages that were clearly her. She types a certain way, so yeah. She would ask for more details on my personal posts or for names of people I was talking about in them. I got tired of dealing with it, so I just recently made an addition to my Tumblr blog description that clearly states that if anyone knows me personally on my blog and we don’t talk, to leave me alone and please get off my blog.

She is now on my blog daily and reblogs things straight from me. I think she’s trying to egg me on, but I’ve really tried to be mature in this whole situation with her and it hasn’t gone well. I don’t know how to get her to leave me alone. She apparently talks about me in school to quite a few people (I’ve had them tell me) and she has told people that I’m a complete bully and a liar and I should never be trusted. I tried to apologize months ago for making her miserable and everything, but she continued to verbally assault me. I think the friendship is basically capoot, but I dunno.

I sound like a 12 year old and I apologize for the length of this but.. Can someone help?

Category: Tags: asked July 18, 2014

5 Answers

The way I see it, it seems as if she wants to edge you so she can talk to you. But going off basted on what you said she just may verbally attack you again. What you need to do is gather up all the things she's sent, told and or posted about you. Just save it all, and if it ever comes to the point that you confront her (witch you might want to think about) you're going to need to show her you have proof that all she is saying is false accusations. She doesn't sound like she's wanting to edge you to the point of physical confrontation but it sounds like quite stalker like behavior. So just keep caution, and if it doesn't stop try public confrontation, not only will you get her attention but with the proof you have it might trigger her to stop once you show her you mean business and not just keep apologizing for something you didn't do.Best of luck though and I hope you feel better (:
If you truly know the reason to her turning against you, then try to see if it's worth mending. But truth is from the way she's treating you, no matter what you did to her, I don't think you guys are going to be friends anytime soon. I suggest you start posting your blogs privately for now, just so there's nothing fueling her attacks and rumors for a while. There's no reason you should attack her back though. Be the bigger person and in the long run, it's going to make her look bad for trashing someone's reputation. You shouldn't have poisonous people like that in your life. You have every right to move on and not care about her anymore. I know it may be tough since you guys were so close for so long. Cherish the person she once was, but face the truth that she is no longer the person you know and at least you left with yourself. Good luck! You'll be fine :)
Well this sounds like the type of person who has many issues. First off congratulations on taking your first steps to distance yourself from her. That is the first step in dealing with this type of individual. Following that it is just a matter of her being a (pardon my french) attention whore. For some reason she has picked you as her target probably because you were friends so she feels entitled and the fact that this makes it easier for her to get to you. So for practical advice some would say close your blog. Personally I don't think that's a good idea as she will then think she has gotten to you. But I do think you should find other ways of expressing yourself. She had made it clear that she follows you so to throw her off try posting other random things on your blog, hell make up stories and throw them in and start saying everything (including what really happen) is fictitious. If she keeps talking about you in school let her. Let people see how little you talk to her and how little she maters to you. Eventually they will realize that she is using you for her own attention. Personally I bully my bullies but you sound like a nice person. Yea I'm sorry if I got off topic but what you described is not friendship. She sounds like a bully and she is best ignored. If you do speak to her try not to react emotionally, I know that sounds stupid but to these people there is nothing worse then being ignored. If you do respond act amused. She is a pathetic joke, treat her like one.
The main issue erupted because of a rumor her boyfriend started. He told her that I called her overobsessive (which, even if I did [which I didn't], isn't that bad) because he had heard a lot of people saying that she was, and he assumed that she would want to hear that a friend would say that rather than someone she didn't like in the first place. She immediately came to me and didn't even ask about it; she just started attacking me. Her message to me, which, by the way was COMPLETELY out of the blue on Facebook included the line:"I'm sorry I ever put my trust in you or considered you a friend because if you say stuff like this you certainly are not one."She never asked if I said it, checked if I said it, questioned it, anything. She's known me for 6 years and has known him for one year. So I didn't understand why she never asked.A week after he told her that and she verbally attacked me, he admitted to her that I actually didn't say that and he made it up. She told me that he admitted to lying, and all that. But she was all, "Oh, no, then you must have IMPLIED it. Because there's no way he would have lied to me."After that argument, the boyfriend dropped off the face of the earth for being my friend. He was talking about becoming more involved in my life and helping out with my situation more, but after he started this, he just stopped talking to me. So I approached him and asked why he chose to leave me alone after he's the one who started the whole thing. After that, shit erupted. They both started getting angry with me from then on. She came to me at around midnight after I asked him why he left and demanded to know why I was yelling at him. I said I wasn't, and that it wasn't her problem to deal with. I said it was between me and him, because it was, actually. She said I was "acting like a bitch" (because apparently ACTING like one and BEING one are completely different), that I suggested again that she was overobsessive (which I didn't??), and that I was incredibly rude. The boyfriend called me selfish, said I took advantage and abused my friends, and said that he was the victim because I had the audacity to ask why he stopped talking to me.It's funny because he did apologize after the fact. I'm still not on the best terms with him, but he did apologize a week after that and we talk on occasion now. She apologized once, and it wasn't for what she said to me. She was sorry for being "brutally honest" for once in her life and that the honesty hurt me. That was it.And the boyfriend has messaged me probably 3 or 4 times in the past month and a half saying that she "misses me" and "wants me back in her life." I told him point-blank that if she did miss me and wanted to make up or whatever, she needed to tell me herself and understand that she was wrong in the first place.
Did you sleep with a guy and then they dated afterwards? But they were friends when you were sleeping with him and she knew how you felt but when you broke his heart he started dating her but never started dating you and she found out you were trying to get back at him but then when confronted by her you reply that she didn't even tell you cause of the drifting friendship and her mom has lekumia in mexico and they're better for each other but can't get over how he made you feel and you get sad whenever you hear the same Andy??:'(