This September will be three years with my partner. We had many ups and downs, through his depression and eventual well deserved recovery,both of us transitioning (he more successfully than I) to entirely different careers, the 12 year age difference between us, a break up and my move abroad, his following me there, and an eventual, joyful reunion. But in the six months since I’ve been home, my feelings for him have been in a state of constant flux. Overnight I will go from loving everything about him, from his weird obsessions to his superlatively good looks, and wanting to marry him and have his ridiculously good looking, intelligent kids, to wishing I was free from him. I imagine the opportunities I would have, the total freedom (although he has zero problem with my extended periods of travel away, there’s still something about having that tie binding me….) I think about how nice it would be to meet someone my age, who doesn’t feel so secure in what he wants, who is still feeling his way, like I am. So what I wonder is, is this a normal thing, that all people go through, or is it a huge warning sign that I should go about getting on?
