Your husband should really support you and not blame you @amanda77, you deserve to be treated with love, care and respect, hold your head up high and keep fighting, you can and will make it through tough times, you are so strong and are never alone, try your best to stay positive and optimistic, you can do this, think good thoughts and please don’t give up, if you need to talk or need a friend, I’m always here, feel free to message me anytime if you want, my inbox is always open (hugs)