Gender Identity help?

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I dont know who I am. sometimes Im feminine, sometimes i am masculine. sometimes i want to wear pretty clothes and makeup and have long pretty hair, and then sometimes i want to cut all of my hair off and idk wear cool guy clothes and just be a guy. i cant be both and i am unhappy. if i cut all of my hair off i will miss it, but the more i grow it out the more i want shorter hair. i am not one gender more than i am the other. who am i? how can I be both? Please help

Category: Tags: asked June 18, 2014

5 Answers

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Try doing things from both sides? Until your happy with what you have don't make rash decisions like cutting your hair, try hanging out with only guy friends more often, go do those urges that you feel when u want to be a guy, and see if its something you'll actually like.
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Are you a teenager? If so, it's very common for teens to be experimenting about their own identities. I had a phase in which I'd love to wear boy's clothes, but there was another phase where I was the contrary. Give yourself time to experiment with what makes you happy, and what makes you feel like yourself. Don't let others judge you about it. Don't worry too much about it and just enjoy the hobbies and activities that make you happy. In due time, you'll have a more defined identity, but you can keep changing throughout your life. Adults go through phases too!IF you are not a teenager (aka you're an adult) do keep in mind that not having a defined image might influence your career life in some parts of the country. But in your personal life you're free to do what you want, and free to find people who will love you for who you are.
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Holy shit I'm the exact same way! Just buy a few girl wigs and have short hair or have mid-length hair,buy clothes for both genders,and do what you feel best in!
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You are most definitely genderfluid (or possibly bigender). Try to look at the tumblr blog "genderfluidity.tumblr.com". You'll find a lot of stuff there.

Like some other people have said above me, get a short wig. They are reasonably cheap on ebay. If you don't know how to put your hair up to wear a wig, cut your hair and get a long wig or clip-in extentions. Or just style it in different ways.
If you want to keep your own hair, ponytails, parting your hair in the middle and keeping your hair away from your face are ways to feel less feminine. You can look into makeup tutorials on youtube too, although some are less helpful than others.
If you have breasts and experience dysphoria, look into getting a binder.

I don't think there's a lot I can say here that won't be better explained by other people in the nonbinary/genderfluid community. So I guess, head over to Google or tumblr and explore!
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Of course you can be both! In fact, you don't need to assume a label, unless you want you. If you were to, I'd possibly suggest you as 'genderfluid', however, I don't know you, and you're the only one who can decide what label relates to you! :)