This question could be very disturbing so please don’t read further if you feel like you might not be able to handle it.
I recently found out that my mom killed my dog and left his meat on my food. Basically, i was eating my own friend for days and I don’t know what to do. She warned me that she would punish me if I couldn’t get first place in a competition. I feel like I am not good enough to exist in this world. Please tell me how to get over this.
I am so sorry. That is horrible!!! And disgusting! Why would she do that? You should tell an adult you trust about this and other tings as well. Let them know how you feel inside also. I know how hard it is to reach out to someone for help but trust me getting intervention is the best thing you can do and you will be so glad you did later on. I have had several different family members and friends physically sexually and mentally abuse me for 17 years. And finally I stood up and got help. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm only 18 now and I live with a friend and her family until I can get on my own two feet. But I no longer am hurting all the time and I can live a normal(ish) life like I always have wanted. Please reach out and get help from someone who can do something and make things better.
I agree with Ed, you need to call the authorities. What she does is absolutely wrong. Your mother sounds very unstable. It is sick and twisted that she killed your dog and that she has been feeding your dog to you. That's really disturbed. Who knows what else she may do. You need to get out there asap. Go to the police or something like that to report her. You need to get out there for your own safety. Your mother needs help. I think she might have a serious mental illness.
Whatever you do, do not take suicide. Suicide is the equal to giving up all hopes not only on the world but on yourself. You are a unique person, able to achieve great things. No matter who you are, you are a wonderful person and I promise that there are atleast 3 people who would miss you, and misses you even now. Do not live at your mom's place if she keeps on abusing you. Do as littlemissbasketball said, live at your friend's place. Intervene. Do not let her abuse you, talk to her about what she has done and make her think about her own actions. If you don't want to talk out to a friend or reach out to her/him, then move to a relative. Whatever you do, do not stay put at your mom's house as that will only feed the monster.Hard work always pays off, but your mother seems to block that off.