mischaracterize said 10 years, 4 months ago:

I think I have forgiven the people who have brought me pain, and I do believe I can recover. I definitely wasn’t able to forgive them immediately, it took a few years, but I’ve forgiven them, even if I still live with the trauma.

I cope with the trauma by going to therapy, and learning as much as I can about recovery. I try to keep my life as relaxed and stress-free as possible. I avoid drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, and escape-ism things. I talk back to the negative voice in my head. I cannot stress how important it has been for me to learn how to relax, and practice relaxation as much as possible.

I definitely try to prevent myself from bringing the same pain to others. I recently realized that I can be emotionally abusive, and I have issues with anger, because I just get so defensive and feel so in the right and threatened. I’ve learned the best thing I can do is let it go and calm down, and be COMPASSIONATE. Always try to see it from their perspective. Speak with “I” statements, not “you” statements. Don’t blame, always take responsibility for my feelings, and thoughts.
But I also make sure I am not taking on somebody else’s thoughts and feelings and pain. I keep clear boundaries on what I need to take responsibility for and what I “own” and what belongs to others.