I have a question! I’m new to blahtherapy and I was really excited when I found an Asexual forum. I’m 20 and identify as a bi-romantic demisexual or grey-A. I’m not really sure at this point which is what is leading up to my question. I’ve been dating my current boyfriend for 2.5 years and he’s the only person I’ve ever been able to bring myself to have sex with but even so it is extremely difficult to get in any sort of frame of mind for that sort of thing. I know that some asexuals (like demisexuals) do have sex… but thoughts of sex and the sort cause serious anxiety for me and I usually feel like I’ve been raped afterward even though it is consensual. Does this happen for other asexuals and is it just part of being A? Or is it just me…

It’s perfectly normal to feel that way about sex! Opinions on sex can vary a lot in the asexual community, the same way that they vary for sexual people. Some asexual people are repulsed by sex, while others are indifferent and don’t mind it, even if they aren’t interested. Some can even have a sex drive without sexual attraction. It’s different for everyone.