Midnightsapphire20 said 9 years, 6 months ago:

I recently came home from a visit with my father (parents divorced) and it has ended the way that many of our visits do, with me an emotional ball of wreckage, and my mother having to worry about my mental state. My father is a very abusive person, in the way he plays mind games and talks to people as though they are lower than him. My father and I share a significant age barrier, with me being 15, and him being in his early fifties. This age difference lead me to believe that this is the reason we do not get along, with his old fashioned ways and me with my new ideals. He believes that a woman is good for nothing but getting her pregnant, and making her have a child. Sex is the most important thing to him, and it somehow always ends up in our conversations. He doesn’t like the fact that I think with my mind, and he proceeds to contradict me, even when I’m right. If I try to defend or try to prove my case, I am threatened with actual physical violence, an example of this would be when I tried to tell him that a phone number was wrong and he wouldn’t listen, I kept trying to tell him, and his words were, “would you just be quiet!? I will punch you in the head, you’re acting just like your mother.” This is the prime reason my mother and father are divorced, because of his temper and his attitude. He talks to everyone he meets like an idiot, and believes himself to be “a God among men.” He’s also the reason I have no self-confidence, due to his constant degrading and is unrealistic expectations, I’m not enough… He’s dating a woman, who hates me, and I can’t stand her… My father has been on several dating sites, and found young woman with “ideal” bodies and called me over saying “There’s your new mommy.” Not only is it infuriating to me because he puts my mother down, but it also implies that someday I’ll live with him. I can say (though it may seem bad) that I hate my father and I hate his character. This continues through family events also, humiliating me by telling everyone the long period of time since I have last seen him. I can’t tell him any of this because he will flip out on all of us, and drag everything out. I needed to get this out, and to make people see how much of an actual pig I deal with. I am not a daughter, I’m a hip ornament to make him look good in front of “the flavor of the month.” I may be overreacting, and I may be saying things I shouldn’t, but enough is enough. I am done being degraded, and fed up with the humiliating bad-mouthing. I may be just like my mother, but to me, that is an amazing person to be like. I know this much… When I turn 18, the first thing I am doing is changing my last name.

rinseandrep said 9 years, 6 months ago:

Your mom did you a solid getting you out of that toxic cloud. How often do you see him?

I don’t think his problem is age, there are people his age that don’t think like him, and people your age that think like him, luckily you have to tolerate him only every now and then now. He seems like someone arguing with has no point, because they’ll never admit to be wrong.

Midnightsapphire20 said 9 years, 6 months ago:

I only see him when I HAVE to see him… which is not often. And you are right he is the type of person where arguing gets us nowhere, well except for him threatening me and me having to go back into counseling. All of my issues seem to stem from him and his ways…