EthanHunter said 5 years, 8 months ago:

Hey everyone, so I am here today to sort of just let off some steam, and possibly see what you can all suggest.

After looking over this, I realized that my post is super long. So let me break it up. If you want to hear a bit about me, the intro, go to: A. Issues with friends, go to: B. Interest in girl, go to C. :) . If you wish to read the whole thing, well… thanks lol.

A
I am 25. I’ve never quite had the experience of a relationship. There were girls that I liked, and nothing ever came from it, friend zoned you name it. I’ve never had an issue with that though. I enjoyed college. Flirting, meeting girls, I liked being single. I was a bit immature too, still am, so I never really realized when a girl was serious or sending me signals. I was pretty contented just hanging around and meeting new people.

B
I guess though, as of late, I’ve had some issues with my friends. I guess you sort of learn who you true friends are when you don’t have a car. I was forsaken. I literally did everything for my friends, I would go out of my way for them. Even if I got home last and exhausted, I would willingly be there for them, ensure they got home. When I didn’t have a vehicle, they rarely called, and those who did and would drive me, would constantly complain about how “out of the way” it was for them. In fact, I didn’t even ask, they would offer. I recall two evenings where two friends I pretty much dropped everything for, dropped me off at my street because it was late and they didn’t want to go in. I live far inside, IF YOU’RE WALKING. If you are driving it takes like two minutes!

In fact, I guess I can share another story involving another “best friend”. One that I cut out from my life and have to endure everyday others telling me to forgive her. How could I forgive her? Do you guys know about football? Well, we are supporters of Bayern, and back in 2013 when they qualified for the UCL final, we decided to go. It was a bit late, and tickets were expensive. I got my hands on two, but she said she could not afford it. So I held back.

We had given up on our dream of going, when I stumbled across a Gazprom advertisement. I called in right away to answer the question. I informed her, and she said she will contact them as well. She even called me back later to find out the answer because she didn’t know.

I have no idea how it worked, but she won the tickets and called me. I was dancing for joy when she dropped me with how happy she was and how her boyfriend would be so happy to hear they were going to England!

I was livid. I was pretty angry, and it got fueled by her saying that I was being unreasonable because I could not expect her to go on a trip with me when she is seeing someone else. After saying some horrible things, he came to my house to tell me I was being unreasonable? Who the heck is he anyway? Yeah, overall I dumped them. She tried to call me when our team won. She tried to call me a lot since then, even sent me emails, but I have ignored them. My “friends” even decided to trick us into meeting. We met up, and then I realized that she was invited as well. I refused to talk to her, and everyone kept insisting I was being stupid about it, and that angered me more. To this day, I have friends who claim I need to let it go. I am not letting that go. Not only did she betray our friendship, but she robbed me. She knew I could have gone to the final without her, I held back on buying the ticket. Then, I give her the answer to win it, and she does that? How am I to forgive her you know?

C
So yeah. Recently, I’ve been interested in meeting this girl at the park. I’ve sort of been drawn to her, because, well, I know it is silly as I don’t know her, but is my type. I find her attractive where some probably won’t. She seems very interesting and I really want to meet her, but the universe seems against it currently haha.

What kind of has me even more interested in meeting her has a lot to do with my “friends”. I don’t really have friends, save for perhaps a trio. Two of which are Doctors and working their internship, so time is not on their side, but we do meet up as often as we can. Which last year, was for a cup of coffee for one hour when they got paged in. So, I totally understand them. That is all I ask for too you know? The willingness to be friends, the interest, the care. We don’t see each other much but we keep connected.

As for my other friend, not to be a jerk, but given his schizoid personality, he isn’t nice to people. He can be embarrassing to be around. He doesn’t have social skills, nor is he ethical. Being around him can damage my character honestly. This dude says what he wants, does what he wants. He is rude.

WHy am I still his friend? Well, against all of that he is there for me and as a victim of bullying myself, until my parents sent me to a new school for a new beginning, I stood up for him one day, and we became friends.

But yeah, I got those three in my life. I got some other buddies I play football with, but… we are just football friends. Beyond that, I am not into the stuff they like doing. Bar hopping, partying, it isn’t my style honestly. I even gave in and experienced it but yeah, just didn’t cut it for me. I guess after some time of not joining them, I became the outcast right?

Sorry for the length, I will wrap up now. I noticed this girl at the park for about three weeks now. I used to go earlier, but with the sun and stuff, I started going later. There it was I noticed her. We’ve made eye contact. Anytime she walks by me (um, she walks faster than I jog haha) she may look away, some cases glance at me. I do the same.

I thought I should stop being childish, and decided to walk the opposite way on the track one day, and I noticed her coming, I looked at her. She saw me, turned away, looked back, turned away haha, and as she approached, I said Good afternoon. She was still looking away but she responded. Then when I saw her the second time, she was jogging, and I saw a hint of a smile as she passed by me again. So, I decided to put a plan into effect.

I went by on Monday. Detected her. I was done, so I chilled in the parking lot, and saw her coming. I huffed, and I puffed, and then this idiot decided to reverse into the park I was standing in. THE HANDICAP PARK. BTW, the idiot was not handicapped. He came out and jogged towards the track before sprinting. But yeah, that’s just an excuse. After that, I shifted, and she was right there in front of me. She was looking at her phone, and for a second I panicked. How the heck do I disrupt her? I let her go.

I raged at myself, because I could not go Tuesday lol. Wednesday, Thursday and Friday came and I didn’t see her. Actually, I thought I saw her in the distance yesterday, but… must have been a mirage lol.

I guess though, me screwing up Monday and not seeing her since, feeling the pain that is inside of me right now, might just be the motivation I need to walk over to her and say Hey.

Oh yeah, just a note, I guess I got angry, when I messaged my friend that I froze. That particular friend has a knack for making everything about her, and somehow she turned it into some problem she was facing, pretty much discounting my issues.

Honestly, people presume I have no issues because I am happy you know. My life is great. I enjoy every bit of it, but you know, as of late, a part of me been wondering about the experience of a girlfriend. So, I may be a bit excited to meet her, but it’s not like I am desperate, or seeking attention, I just… want to meet her and see where it leads.

As for advice, what I want to know is, how do I approach her without making her feel uncomfortable. I know ladies can be a bit insecure in some cases when they are in sweat clothes, with their hair tied up and without make up. I don’t want to cause her any unease. I don’t want to be a) the annoying guy who disrupts her work out. She seems really into it. b) The stalker in the parking lot. c) That guy who is just looking for a little something something and is only interested in me because I look fine lol.

So nice to meet everyone, and… sorry for the length of my tale!

Silent Rain said 5 years, 8 months ago:

First I’ll say something that you’re not going to want to hear. About that one friend of yours, that girl, my opinion is that I have to agree with what your friends said. You’re being unreasonable. It’s perfectly understandable that she went to that game with her boyfriend when she won those tickets. Even though you looked forward to go with her, you should understand that she wanted to go with her boyfriend. It’s normal for people to do such things with their significant other. So I think you definitely overreacted. I know you don’t want to hear that, but that’s how it is.

About that girl that you seem to like who jogs, it’s good that she smiled at you. At least she’s not making a weird face. A smile is a start. If you’d walk up to her for a conversation, then you’re also showing some confidence. Most people find confidence attractive. It’s an attractive trait to have. You can walk up to her, say hello and shortly introduce yourself. Just say “hello, my name is “…” Most likely she’ll reply by saying her name. You can start a conversation from there. If it goes well, you can try to ask if she’d like to hang out with you sometime. Good luck.

Silent Radiance said 5 years, 8 months ago:

…and just to add a bit to the end there, remember that she’s just a girl. I know you like her, but she’s human. If she’s on her phone or she’s doing something, I’m sure if you went up and talked to her that she would be nice back. We worry like crazy about everything that can go wrong that we forget that the other person is…you know…a person haha. If she’s on her phone and you say something and she snaps at you, chances are she’s not worth dating. If you see that she’s rude and can’t say hi to a person she sees often and SMILED to, there is something up with her. So don’t be too shy ^_^.

EthanHunter said 5 years, 8 months ago:

Thanks for the reply Silents!

Firstly, I really did not want to hear that lol. I disagree though, I was not being unreasonable. When we won the semi final vs. Barcelona, we turned to each other and said we would love to go to the final in Wembley. I asked if she was serious, and she said yeah, we should definitely go. She got her laptop and we attempted to book our tickets on the site, but apparently the site crashed.

We were dejected, kept checking the site then we learned that most of the tickets were bought back in February, and the remaining ones were settled between the two teams. So we had to buy it elsewhere. Obviously prices sky rocketed. We were looking. It was understood we were going to get tickets together. HEY BOYFRIEND DOESN’T EVEN LIKE FOOTBALL!

I found two awesome tickets, but the price was super high. I even offered to buy them for her, but she refused and said that we shouldn’t go. She even talked me out of buying that ticket until “we could find something cheaper”. We kept looking. All this time she never mentioned she was in it to get two tickets for herself, she kept insisting it was both of us getting the tickets.

Then when she won the promotion, after I told her about it, AFTER I GAVE HER THE BLOODY answer, she turned around and takes him instead? How exactly was I unreasonable? He isn’t even a football fan. I think she was unreasonable.

As for your replies,

I am usually a confident guy, but like just around her I am just so stupid lol. You’re right, she has not shown any sign that she hates me. The smile was quick, she usually seems a bit tense around me though haha. I was a bit worried my eye contact made her nervous.

Yeah, definitely. I need to remember she is a person too haha. You’re so right, if she reacts in a negative way then she definitely isn’t somebody I want to date. Besides, for all I know, she probably saw me and whipped out her phone to avoid looking in my direction. Actually, whenever we cross paths while walking, she usually glances at her phone. Then again, she could be using the S Fitness app to keep track of what she is doing haha.

I know that when I do approach, I am leading with hey and a smile. If I say anything, more than likely she will respond with what? So I need to draw her attention, and then, depending on her response, I will work to suit. The only issue is that… stepping up! What can I do to ensure my legs move towards her? I need to move my legs, I could have been road kill when that guy reversed haha.

Confidence. A person. Breathe… breathe…

She will be nice back, once I am not a creep. Once I don’t walk up and be all, “UGHHHH… Dang girl, how about we slow it down a bit you’re going way to fast for me!” LOL.

You know what’s another issue. On Thursday I was leaning on my car waiting to see her. This guy and his friends parked next to me and were hanging around there. All I kept thinking was, OH DEAR GOD… They are going to see me attempt to talk to her. They may see me get shut down… or worse, they may see my happy dance.

OMG! What if she sees my happy dance? She might change her mind!

Silent Radiance said 5 years, 8 months ago:

You’re thinking a lot, that’s normal ^_^. Just don’t worry and go talk to her with a smile. That’s all the advice I can give you. It’s up to you now buddy, be yourself!

About your friend though, I’m not saying you’re wrong for being angry. I would feel a bit sad too, that’s not where you went completely wrong. The part where you went wrong was when she tried to talk to you about it and you completely shut her out. You absolutely refused to see her even when she makes the effort to come to you. Everyone deserves a chance to explain themselves, especially if that person is your best friend. Talk to her, see her reasoning. You’re looking at it entirely from your perspective. She won the tickets and thought it would be a nice date with her boyfriend, they’re in love. It’s unfortunate that you didn’t get to go, but you can’t just throw an entire relationship away over tickets. That’s not right. She obviously cares about your feelings and wants to be your friend, otherwise she wouldn’t come see you. If she was as selfish as you say, then she’d ignore you and just be happy with her boyfriend. You’re never going to always agree with someone in any relationship, whether love or friendship, but what determines how close you two are is your ability to work through the problems together.

EthanHunter said 5 years, 8 months ago:

Totally not liking you right now -_-. Haha, and totally pissed as I just wrote another long piece and I accidentally closed all tabs.

I remember our conversation vividly. She called me up right away and said that she won the tickets We were very excited and I was dancing for joy. What got me was when I asked her when she would be getting our tickets. She responded, “Our tickets? Eats, I already told Kevin.”

I sensed where this was going so I kept my cool and asked what she meant. She asked me what I thought she meant, and added “obviously I am taking Kevin.”

I tripped, and I asked her what the beep she meant she was taking Kevin, and she would go on to tell me that SHE WON THE TICKETS NOT ME? She did not win the tickets! She had no freaking idea what the answer to the question was, or what the promotion was. She called me panicking about it. I gave her the answer! I reminded her about that, and she said, “Yeah you did, but they chose me didn’t they?” That was where my anger ignited and we had it out. She somehow managed to fit in, “You’ve always been jealous of Kevin.” in there which made me angrier. I was never jealous of her stupid boyfriend. In fact, I was the one who hooked them up. We usually met up for lunch, and anytime I went to her class he was always hanging around. They were in the same group but never spoke, and he would be on the far end. I also noticed when we did go out to get lunch, he would somehow manage to find himself there. So I looked at him one day, “Hey dude! Since you usually get lunch at the same places we do, how about you join us?” He didn’t, but I forced him to, and then I asked him what his name was, I introduced him to her, then they acknowledged they already knew each other’s names. So I said, “You know her name, she knows yours, perhaps you two should go have lunch and talk about. Later!”

It was from there things went awesome. She called me afterwards to tell me how awesome it was and that they decided to go out on a date. How exactly was I jealous of him? We became friends. One evening we were playing football. He couldn’t play, but he has speed so he quickly adapted to the game. I had sent a ball over the defenders for him, it was just a basic play, for that second I forgot he was still new to the process, and he didn’t read it properly and it collided with him on his face. There was blood, not bad, but yeah.

I endured months of people saying I looked at him and FIRED the ball. I did not do that. Even she told me (she was watching) that I turned to him and fired. I did hit it a bit harder than usual, because I had defenders on me. I didn’t have time, and I didn’t even see Kevin honestly, I just detected I had two friends out wide, one of them was clear, and I sent it ASAP. Kevin was cool with it though. I explained but he insisted it was all right. I guess that was where some people began the jealousy thing.

So yeah, she said that we WERE buying tickets together, but then we gave up. Which is partly true, but we gave up with the idea of keeping our eyes opened for two tickets. She even called me one day and said she heard the bar outside of our campus had a competition to win tickets. We went TOGETHER only to learn that it was tickets to get free drinks on the final day. We left dejected. So all this time, we were in it together. WE WERE IN IT TOGETHER! Then she wins the tickets, I TOLD HER ABOUT, and tells me it was hers and the boyfriend?

As for him, he came over to my house and before I even opened the gate he greets me with, “What the hell is your problem? Cursing my girlfriend on the phone, don’t you think you’re being unreasonable?”

I was really not expecting him to hit that, and I asked him if he thought she was being reasonable, and he said yeah. He even added that she was his girlfriend and I needed to accept that. He said I needed to move on from her, and I asked him if he was telling me to stay away from her. He said that she was too nice to say anything, but she feels uncomfortable around me, and now it is worse that I want to go to England with her. –We went to St Lucia a year before before btw. She and I, just the two of us, sharing a room with two beds. So, please explain to me how she became uncomfortable? I even left the room whenever she had to shower and stuff. She was with Kevin then as well! We’ve been friends since our “I HATE BOYS/GIRLS!” phase, how exactly could she become uncomfortable with me?

So, I told him that it was not his place and I think it would be best if he left. He asked, and I quote, “What the beep you gonna do if I don’t?” I responded that he was a guest in my home,and I am not going to do anything. I told him it sounded like he was jealous of my relationship with her, and informed him that he did not need to worry, I was going to stop being her friend. He said I was unreasonable to treat her that way, that it was her tickets, not mine. I asked him to make up his mind, because on one hand I make her uncomfortable, but on the other hand I have to keep being her friend. So I told him to go beep himself and I was done speaking.

Then later, she calls me to argue with my attitude towards him and said I owed them an apology? I asked her if this trip with her boyfriend was more important than our friendship. She said that she couldn’t believe I am making her have to make a decision like that, and I told her that this trip was about us going to support our team, and she said that it was more than that to her. So I told her to enjoy it. She said she intended to, and I was not going to ruin it for her acting like an ass. I tripped again, if I was an ass, she was being a major bitch, and we exchanged harsh words with each other. Until she said she didn’t think it made sense because she was not giving up the tickets. I told her that at that point, I could care less about the tickets and I had no intentions of going. She told me she was going and I had to deal with it. I told her I was dealing with it, and likewise she would deal with the consequences. She claimed I was being immature, and I had to grow up and one day realize the world does not revolve around me and blah blah blah.

I never said the world revolves around me. Silent, I know you think I am looking at it from my point of view alone, but I’ve considered a lot of things that she talked about. I was sad, hurt, upset. I am not denying that. I wanted to go to the final. I had the ticket in my grasp. I gave it up because she couldn’t afford it. We kept looking, and looking, and then she wins the stupid promotion which makes little sense, because I called it at least two minutes after I saw the promotion on Facebook. She called in way in the evening. How the heck did she win? I don’t care about anything, even my sister loves Bayern, but if I won those tickets, I was taking my friend because we were both in it together. My sister wanted to go though, but she also had other things going on. I even talked to her, “Sis, if we won the Gazprom promotions, would you be all right if I didn’t get you a ticket?” And she was fine with it.

My friend tried to reach out? She is trying to save face. You really think calling me after we won the final was the right thing? I was in a happy mood until she dialed. She sent me a text after ringing about 500 times, “OMG WE WON! BEST FINAL EVER!” I also saw her on the TV during the celebrations. Everybody was up and about, and that moron Kevin was in his seat looking like he was seconds from dreamland. –He wrote on his facebook that it was the most boring experience ever. How the heck can one say, “football is so boring, they take too long to score a goal.” What? You want them to just roll it into the net for the entire match you idiot? Football is beyond that. My team nearly bloody lost countless of times, and I still enjoyed the match!! The goalkeepers saved a lot, it was two sided, the goals were hard, worked goals. Boring?

So yeah, that is how it went down. I am not being unreasonable, I don’t see it that way. I can consider that okay, yeah, she is right when she says they are HER tickets. They were. She won them. But she betrayed me. They were HER tickets, with MY answer and we were BOTH going to the final.

Regardless, you think it doesn’t hurt me that we don’t talk anymore? She was my best friend. We shared everything. Even our parents miss us. They go out together for dinner and stuff. We were that close. I miss having her mom’s cake. I know she would miss having my mom’s Lasagne and Pizza. I miss that interaction. I miss her brother. The little guy is probably all grown up now. I do, I miss her a lot. But there is a principle involved, and she clearly doesn’t think she has to apologize for anything.

I also went to Wrestlemania 30 last year with my sister. I had such an awesome time. In the back of my mind though, I did wonder how much fun my friend would have had if she was there. Then it hit me, she would have had SO much fun, having stolen the tickets from my sister and I.

So yeah, I know I may be harsh, but it is unforgivable what she did. And if she is “uncomfortable” with me then perhaps it is best we stay away from one another.

rinseandrep said 5 years, 8 months ago:

I know it’s very easy to tell yourself you are right, and why. Still, you are an adult male, and you aren’t talking with this person, and you are even making a big fuss when you are in the same room together. That’s childish, and all people see it. In a few years, you will also probably look back and think “I handled that a bit too intensely”.

It’s fine to feel betrayed, it’s fine to not want to spend as much time together, but the socially mature responsible thing to do would be to politely do the minimum amount of conversation. That’s even what people in a social gathering with an ex abuser are advised to do.

What you are doing now tells people that you are too intense. And it tells your ex friend that not going on a trip alone with you was the best choice ever.

You need to work on this kind of emotional and social intelligence if you want partners, because imagine if park girl reads all this, how many red flags will she notice?

- changing idea means silence treatment and verbal abuse
- whatever gift given has silent clauses and will become a binding contract
- tendency to long internal negative rumination that will be used as a barrier to all different opinions.

EthanHunter said 5 years, 8 months ago:

Seriously not liking you either haha.

Look, I am grateful for your insight. I feel that way myself, partly, but I definitely am not being immature. If she is uncomfortable with me, why does she even want to be my friend? I didn’t react negatively. When I realized they tricked me and she was there, she came by and said hello. I did respond in kind, and I was a bit vague with my responses to her. Then she turned to everyone and said, “See, he isn’t even going to try.” Then they, my “friends” suddenly started attacking me for not engaging her in conversation? That was wrong of them. I told them I was leaving, and I did. I intended to leave all along, but I did respond to her right?

So, it seems pretty easy to accuse me of being the wrong one here, but you mean to tell me that none of you hold her in the wrong?

That is not a fair assessment of me. I am intense yes, but no, I do not hold those things over people. I have no problem with someone agreeing or disagreeing with me, I will not lock people in contracts over silent clauses, nor do I hold grudges over silly matters.

This was a different situation. I am right to feel betrayed, but it doesn’t matter how I feel because I was betrayed. Look, if she got two tickets to the final and said she was taking him, it’s all right. but she didn’t get them. WE GOT THEM. In fact, she didn’t even get them, I GOT THEM. Faith just chose her.

So tell me, what do you want me to do? Go over, hug her tightly and forget this crap ever happened? I can’t even do that, might make her feel uncomfortable too. Besides, she can bloody well visit me at home. My parents are there, so she won’t have to worry about me making a move on her, or killing her in front of witnesses.

Valeska said 5 years, 8 months ago:

Hey Ethan!

One of the key things when meeting girls for the first time is knowing that all girls would love it if a guy approaches them. Tell me, would you not be happy if a girl approached you? You might do your little happy dance when you got home right?

When guys approach us we feel super happy, even if we don’t feel the same way. Go in brave. Go in knowing that you are going to make her day, regardless of what happens. If she rejects you, or is mean, well, thank goodness you discovered that right then and there. Always remember though, that you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. You gain a girlfriend or a friend, if not you cannot lose what you didn’t have. So you are not making a loss!

I hope you like me Ethan, because I am with you most of the way with your friend,but I am also disappointed at some aspects.

I had an unfortunate circumstance with my best friend’s ex boyfriend. He kissed me and it was very hard for me, I knew I had to tell her. I did, and as you can imagine it did not boil over well. She was very mad at me, and to be honest, until now, I feel like she still hates me at times.

We are quite close, much like the two of you are. I know she betrayed you. You, like my friend, have every right to hate her. From your friend’s perspective, well, I think she was wrong to do that, but you need to ask yourself if that was a betrayal that means your friendship has to terminate. It sounds like the two of you are super close, and I cannot say why she didn’t come over… and honestly I don’t understand why the two of you stopped visiting each other. Your “fight” is with her, not her brother, mom, dad, your sister, your mom nor your dad. I think there is something deeper there. You talked about principles, well, I think it goes beyond even that. Is it possible, not saying it is, that there is that slight bit of envy, that after so many years you feel like she just cast you aside for her boyfriend? You did also mention that you were young and immature and never picked up on signals girls might have sent your way. What if she is attracted to you? What if that is why she has been forming a bit of distance? You did say you two traveled together a lot, but have you ever considered that your friendship probably could be more as well?

Regardless of what it is, I love my friend. She loves me too…. she has come around a lot. There is sadly still that bit of hurt she has, and I know she feels a bit insecure about me, but through all of that, I love her. She loves me. Her dad with a fierce gaze is also enough to ensure she is nice to me. lol.

EthanHunter said 5 years, 8 months ago:

Thanks Valeska. Cute picture btw. :)

You’ve given me a lot to ponder over, I am at a bit lost for words. As for your advice on Park girl. You are right, I am not going to lose anything! If I am to make a girl do her happy dance, THEN I SHALL STEP IT UP!!! :)

As for the other things you said, I don’t know what it is between us. I don’t think we ever had feelings for each other like that. We grew up like brother and sister. I guess, all of you, even the people I hated above lol, is right to some extent. We should fix things.

Nothing is unforgivable… but you know, deep down I feel really hurt. A true friend would never do that, and again, I am not being selfish. She is welcomed to go with whoever she wants on a trip, but this was a different kind of trip.

I should mention though, our parents are not really satisfied with the situation either. In fact, they’ve invited us along to their dinner gatherings. I’ve gone sometimes, and she is never there. I don’t know if she avoids going because I am there. The times I didn’t go, my mom mentioned that she was there, so yeah, I don’t know…

Valeska, I guess I understand your situation and I am glad you guys worked things out. I suppose I should try. I don’t know honestly, a part of me feels like she needs to try harder too. Not trick my friends into bringing me along, why can’t she seek me out? Because Valeska, you went to your friend regarding what happened, you didn’t wait for HER to come to you right?

Reflecting on our past, I don’t think she ever sent me any signs that she liked me. We kissed back in high school, but that was more like a friendly thing. It was awkward as hell and we just did it because we both never had a first kiss. My sister did suggest I keep an eye out in the event she was expecting more and I hurt her. I did watch out as best as I could, but it became a “Omg do you remember the time we kissed?” moment. “Holy hell, what were we thinking!”

EthanHunter said 5 years, 8 months ago:

Is this the Universe’s way of saying Beep you Ethan?

Like what the hell? She is there Monday-Thursday!!! I put my plan in motion last Monday, froze… let her go. I had to work late on Tuesday and couldn’t go. I didn’t see her Wednesday, Thursday, Friday AND NOW TODAY SHE ISN’T THERE? gah!

I don’t know, did she go earlier or something? I usually start up about 530… I usually see her pop around the track about 545/6pm… usually she is out by 6:45! I didn’t see her at all!!! WHERE ARE YOU!!!!!

I am seriously done here, not even going to bother. I am going to practice everyday meeting a girl, or imagine meeting one! So if I ever see one I am interested in ,making my move!!!

So much for making her day Valeska. So much for my happy dance as well.

Silent Rain said 5 years, 8 months ago:

She might had something else to do or she could be sick. There’s a whole list of reasons why she might not have been there today. It seems like you’re done really fast. You seem to be really frustrated that she wasn’t there, while there probably is a very good reason. Try to relax a bit. Today isn’t the only day there is. There are still more days in the future.

EthanHunter said 5 years, 8 months ago:

Yeah haha. I just got back and haven’t showered yet, so just expressing the disappointment right now lol.

I am not done, but I am done in terms of building up hopes to see her. I just got to see her and do it, don’t plan anything. Doesn’t matter!

True, yes, I just got to be positive! Maybe she didn’t show up because she missed me last tuesday and was too depressed to return hahaha. –Sorry we said positive not wishful thinking. lol.

I am just super excited to do this. Approach her. I sort of went today like overly pumped. I did a lot of work outs at home, so if I saw her today, I could even skip my work out to talk to her or attempt to keep at her speed. I was just, brave. Strong. I felt more confident. Kept repeating to myself, make her day, make her day, make her day, make your day! I don’t know if I will ever have that again, I don’t want to freeze up lol.

Silent Radiance said 5 years, 8 months ago:

Just because things don’t always work out the way we want to, doesn’t mean we should give up. You should still be excited, your opportunity will come! And sometimes at the most unexpected moments too ;) .

EthanHunter said 5 years, 8 months ago:

Yeah so true. Perhaps this little delay and her disappearance will give me the motivation I need to step up!

I will do my best. :) This also allows me to say, I haven’t seen you around for a while, what have you been up to? ;)

Oh gosh, feeling excited again!