Mewt said 6 years, 8 months ago:

It’s about my mother, lately every conversation we have ends up fighting. It literally ruins my whole day. Even if it’s about silly things.

So I tried to teach her how to use my old smartphone today. I wanted to teach her the basics, so I started right away. She always take notes when I try to teach her something, but end up losing it. So this time I told her: I’ll show it to you, so you don’t have to take notes. She insisted to take notes or else she can’t remember it. So I continued my explanation about adding contacts and how to use whats-app (she literally never touches any devices).

So after I explained those two things, I wanted her to practice what I taught her. So without my help she started, and after a moment she was already asking for my help. I was getting a bit pissed here as you can see. I asked: didn’t you wrote it all down? which she answered: Can’t you just help me a little bit (avoiding my question). I began to explain everything again, and the first thing she does was grabbing her note. At that moment I yelled: Don’t take any notes! She was not amused and replied with: Why do you force me to do it your way. As the conversation continued, I was getting more angry and losing my patience. She did not learn how to use the phone…

Sooo basicly my mother thinks she knows best, and sometime she is right. but she thinks she is right ALL THE TIME. ITS INSANE…. how can a person be like that. I am starting to hate her, literally ignoring her.

Deleted User said 6 years, 8 months ago:

Firstly,you only get 1 mum and you know what they say never to question your parents and that bullshit
But for any person if they refuse to learn your way in a way that’s simple don’t bother you must remember teaching the older generation technology is hard for them
I’m sure your mother loves you a ton try to listen to eachother and most importantly try not to loose your temper with her
Take a breath and walk away in future

Swifting said 6 years, 8 months ago:

I’m with @Beng1188 on this one… some people learn differently. Technology is something very hard for people to understand and change with.

Deleted User said 6 years, 8 months ago:

There comes an age when there are certain mindsets and principles embedded into our minds.Its hard to teach older people about technology because they have already passed through their learning phase of their lifetime.Also some grownups resent the idea (most often subconsciously) that they are dependent on their children to teach them something (who learned everything from them).Its not their fault, most people who haven’t grown up with technology have a hard time adapting to it.Be patient with her
.Who knows how much effort she put in teaching you to walk or helping you with your homework as a kid…

Jess said 6 years, 8 months ago:

I agree with everyone. Technology is hard for some. Today I learned that my aunt actually paid for an education course on how to use Facebook. Like, I’m not even joking. She went out, and paid someone to tell her how to use a website. She’s not boring or stupid, she’s quiet the opposite, she is my favourite aunt, but she just doesn’t get social media at all.

My grandma was similar, she couldn’t ever remember how to work the TV/DVD/video player (back in the day, lol videos) so my Grandad actually printed and laminated step-by-step instructions for her so she never got stuck again.

I don’t really have any advice other than to just breathe and let it go or else you’re just gonna be holding onto meaningless arguments forever. I know you probably want to be right but sometimes even when you are right, you just have to walk away. I mean, a year from now, will this situation really matter? Does it really matter?

Angel Demon said 6 years, 8 months ago:

You need to have more patience. You don’t give her any time to be able to absorb anything you tell her. And on top of that, she obviously has a different learning style than you do. The best thing you can do, from a teacher’s point of view, is to learn how the person you are trying to teach learns, so that you can teach them in a format that they can understand.

You can’t expect other people, or especially force other people to learn in a way that they are not comfortable with. As much as it may be difficult for you to do, you’ve got to consider your mother’s point of view and let her learn her way.

You will need to work on your patience, and not get so frustrated when she doesn’t do things perfect the first time. Everyone, including you, takes time to learn new things and new concepts, and technology is one of those concepts that is very finicky and always changing. So to jump into technology when being away from it for virtually the entirety of its progression is going to be a daunting task for anyone, no matter who you are.

It’s easy to say it’s easy after growing up with it and having it with you all your life, but it’s essentially the equivalent of being thrown into the pilot’s seat of an aircraft when you’ve never flown before. You can think about it and say ‘yeah, I can do this.’, but then when you sit down in that seat and see the hundreds of buttons, switches, screens and instruments, it can easily be intimidating enough to scare a person away from it entirely.

Now teaching something like a phone obviously isn’t as complex as piloting an aircraft, but it’s a milder form of it to a person who’s completely technologically illiterate. It’s going to take time, and mistakes will be made. What you’ve got to do in the situation is give in just as much effort as your mother is in attempting to learn it in the first place. With you giving up almost immediately, if not immediately every time she asks for help, you’re abandoning her to her own devices, so obviously yes she is going to get frustrated at you for doing so. How would you like it if you were given a new math problem in school using a system that you’ve yet to use, and the math teacher didn’t instruct you on how to solve it, yet expected you to know how to get the answer?

Mewt said 6 years, 8 months ago:

Thanks everyone for responding :)

I actually teached her how to use a computer and the ipad before(too bad she forgot it). But the problem of technology is that it’s ever changing, and i want to teach her a way to improve and adapt to the changes with minimum help of others. But thanks for the advices, I’ll keep them in mind next time.