 Familiar Face
1650 QA Reputation253 | LoverOfPitBulls101 said 10 years, 1 month ago: Hey, I’m a 16 year old high school student registered as as female on all my papers. For many years I haven’t really been that comfortable with my gender. A lot of the time it feels like I don’t really belong and that I’m just using this body as an excuse to get off easier in gym and that kind of stuff. At my school at least the male fitness classes are a lot more straining than the female ones. Anyways…
One of my larger problems with that though is that I don’t know if I would be truly comfortable as a male either. Up until about this year in highschool I’ve had a pretty big fear and distrust of males. (Okay, I know they aren’t all bad and the friends of my friends are pretty nice and everything. Even around them I would still get freaked out though I was also careful to never show it and I would also tremble.) I think that is mostly because of some stuff that has happened when I was a kid that’s gone and past now. I try not to think about it or let it affect my life in any way.
Up until about 8th grade I didn’t really think I had attractions for anyone at all. I’d never felt super connected to anyone. I had friends and I loved them, but just as friends. It was that year of school that I came to terms that I was attracted to females. Not sexually or anything, I’m not really a sexual person. So pretty much I thought I could only like girls until I met this dude this year and dated a bit (I think atleast…) though it always felt kind of wrong being with him.
I might be getting distracted here…anyways since about the 5th grade I’ve always wondered what it would like to be male, always wanting something more for myself that just what I was born with. I think some people might say I dress more or like for a guy. Anything formal I’ll go out in a pair of dress pants, a nice button-up long sleeve white shirt and a vest. Let’s just face it, my family can’t afford a tux, especially not for me.
I’ve kind of accepted the fact that I’m female over the years, I mean, what is there to do about it? I don’t really think I can tell my parents right now either. I’m actually really envious of the girls with a-cups. I’ve never really enjoyed ‘maturing’ and gaining more of the shape of a feminine body. I hate it but I don’t really tell anyone. I tried talking to one of my friends once and she just told me that I was crazy. Sorry if I got distracted. Ideas? | |
 Passing Stranger
455 QA Reputation113 | Fox Lady said 10 years, 1 month ago: I’m not sure what kind of ideas you’re asking for here to be completely honest, BUT, I will say that I don’t think you’re crazy. I think what you’re going through is something that should be considered normal, but unfortunately isn’t yet. Maybe in oh, 20 or 30 years, this kind of thing will be more commonly accepted n.n
I would like to say that I happen to be going through the same thing that you are, though I am on the opposite side of the spectrum whereas I am considered male, and I feel as if I was supposed to be female at birth. I’ve never told anyone about it as of yet either, I still keep it to myself :p
I’d like to offer you someone to chat with, if you’re interested  Feel free to send me a message anytime! That aside, I’d also like to say that I think you should do what makes you feel comfortable, and what makes you feel good about yourself, what makes you happy You seem to have attributes of both male and female, but I believe this is a hormone thing. Hormones do have an altering effect on our perception of not only ourselves, but things as well. I believe that if I was born the female I feel I should have been, I would have very few boyish attributes. And perhaps if you were born a boy, you would have very few girlish attributes It’s a theory at best, or perhaps simply a thought. But, it is an opinion nonetheless :p | |
 Familiar Face
5826 QA Reputation111 | Kirstin Lopez said 10 years, 1 month ago: It doesn’t matter how you dress or who you have feelings for it’s about how you feel in your body. Personally, I know someone who isn’t sexual either and has also questioned their gender at times and has not had a happy life, but all these haven’t added up to her being transgendered. She does not dress feminine like yourself and has dated boys and has feelings for girls but does not like to be touched, and i thought this may because she was transgendered but it is because she is a “Stone top” or stone sexuality which is just that she doesn’t like to be touched and gets her pleasure mentally. also, you could not be sexual because of your experiences in the past, it took me 6 years after my experiences to even attempt a sexual relationship and i am a girl who likes girls and that may be your issue. you can be a girl and be bi or pansexual and dress masculine, that;s fine. What i’m saying is you don’t have to fit into a box. everything doesn’t need to be checked off to be a girl, you can be whoever you want to be and no one can tell you who that is. if you want to like boys and girls but not have sex thats fine, if you want to be a girl that dresses masculine thats fine too, if you feel as though you were born into the wrong body go see a therapist to help you come to the conclusion of whether or not that is what is best for you. you decide. | |
Familiar Face
1650 QA Reputation253 | LoverOfPitBulls101 said 10 years, 1 month ago: @Fox Lady: I actually didn’t know either. I haven’t really had time to work into it at all before. I’ve been too busy trying to get my depression and S.H under control for awhile now. Now that that’s better I have time to focus on other things more. Heck, it might have been some of it but there’s just no time if you know what I mean. Thank you for sharing though. I guess it’s kind of nice to know someone else feels pretty similar.
@Kirstin Lopez: A lot of kids at my school are actually homosexuals, bisexuals, or pansexuals. No one cares that much there. I guess it wasn’t so much as an issue as a fact. But yeah, spot on. I’ve thought of seeing a therapist before though of course there is issues with money, transportation, and I don’t really want to tell my parents quite yet. Maybe when I get a job and a car and have a bit more freedom I can try and talk to one. Might be what I end up doing here in another year or two when I can. Thanks for sharing. | |
 Newbie
0 QA Reputation0 | Deleted User said 10 years, 1 month ago: I believe you’re looking for happiness, but since you could have gone through some trauma (if not, I’m sorry I don’t mean to offend) to where marriage with the opposite sex is wrong, but if you think about it you can be the change you wish to see in the world. You may not like this suggestion, but if you get married with the opposite sex that’s right for you and have children with a perfect life you’d be the most happiest woman alive. Woman = Wom-b- from a Man. try it, God bless you. | |
 Familiar Face
1289 QA Reputation245 | Princen said 10 years, 1 month ago: Hey there! I’m 15 and I’m transgender. I’m nonbinary which means I’m not solely a boy or a girl (although I am a bit more boy). There’s nothing wrong with what you’re feeling and I’m just going to say that it really really sounds like you’re trans. You don’t have to resign to the fate of anything you don’t want to be. Gender is what is in you’re heart, not what your body looks like. Who would you be if you could be anyone? If you dislike the body you’re growing into you can change it. Maybe not now, but you could have a flat chest, a deep voice, angles instead of curves. If that’s not what you want that’s completely fine and you never ever have to rush into anything. Just give yourself the time and freedom to figure out who you are and what you’re comfortable with at your own pace. I really don’t like my body a lot of the time. It feels like it doesn’t fit and with each passing year it’s fitting less and less. I’m thinking about having top surgery (to have a masculine chest) and maybe go on hormone replacement therapy to look more masculine. Even if my body changes to look more like a typical guy’s I’ll still be nonbinary, just like I’m nonbinary now, but I’ll feel comfortable in my own skin which is something I really need.
I’m out to a few friends and they call me Asa and use gender neutral pronouns and it’s awesome. When I’m with them I van be myself and be seen for who I am, and that’s something I’ve never had before. | |
