lexi said 9 years, 6 months ago:

This might sound silly, but I always feel this emptiness when I notice that my scars are fading or have faded. It’s almost like I’m glad they’re gone so I don’t have to keep hiding my wrists but I also feel like they should be there, so it gives me this lost feeling like I want to add more but I know I shouldn’t. It’s such a tricky thing… my scars are such a big part of recovery but they also take me right back to the start.

sailsun said 9 years, 5 months ago:

I feel the exact same way. I cut when I feel strong emotions, so I tend feel like my emotions are in the scars so when they go away it’s like erasing me and the things I’ve experienced and that’s often a cause of relapse.

BlondeVol said 9 years, 5 months ago:

I felt that way too when I used to cut!! I actually got a tattoo where one of my scars was so I’d never forget and feel empty again.

Violet said 9 years, 5 months ago:

Yea, when my scars fade I feel lost and confused, I try to get them back by going deeper, I want more and more scars when I look at mine so I can show people that Im not a faker because people always think Im faking. So I can show people that Ive been through something… maybe just a pinch, or a war. Either one. I have the crave to go through something tragic.. people think its weird.. but is it?

✧Sumer✧ said 9 years, 5 months ago:

A LOT of people have this problem. It’s normally apart of the addiction, the scars. That’s why a lot of people draw on themselves why recovering, it’s somewhat the same satisfaction as the scars.

Message me if you’d like to talk more. Stay strong <3

jennippy said 9 years, 5 months ago:

I kind of feel empty once they fade as if they’re punishment I mean I did put them on there for a reason for punishment

Rain said 9 years, 5 months ago:

For me personally, even if some scars seems to fade, the memory will still be there. It’s a bit different to see some fade a bit, but I don’t mind if they do. I don’t need them to be reminded of the things that have happened. I can also see the other side of those who want to keep seeing their scars as a part of their recovery. It’s just that for me personally, it wouldn’t matter if they would fade away, because the scars inside me will always remain.

Ember said 9 years, 5 months ago:

I feel the same. Often, my bipolar cycles back to depression when the scars have faded a bit, and I add more. I know it’s awful, but I feel the need to have more. No one has noticed, so I need to make sure they’re still there so that at least I notice. I’m trying to take up drawing on my wrists rather than cutting. At least with drawing, you can make them beautiful and they don’t hurt you the same way cuts do. You know what I mean? You have just as much power over the pictures and words you write as you do with the cuts. You have that power, that outlet that people like us need. I really do hope that you and everyone else reading this can begin to understand that fading scars mean that you are heal and you still have power. You have the power to not pick up that blade when you feel powerless. You overpowered the urge and that shows even more about you than the scars ever will.

scarlett said 9 years, 4 months ago:

I feel that once my scars fade I feel like it was all for nothing even though it wasn’t and that all the pain that was taken out is just leaving…

big pipsqueak said 9 years, 4 months ago:

I like looking at my scars and especially at the fresh cuts. I want to never stop if stopping will mean not having fresh cuts anymore.

Sorry said 9 years, 4 months ago:

I always felt like having fresh cuts gave me more worth. Hard to imagine how that makes sense, but it is how I felt. The more some of them fade, the harder it becomes to resist, especially on days that are harder than normal. Like by not cutting, I’m trying to resist being who I am.

Deleted User said 9 years, 4 months ago:

when the scars fade, i feel an intense urge to make more.