Jemclemons said 10 years, 7 months ago:

On January 20, 2012, my nephew Christian was born, and died two hours later. It doesn’t matter that we were aware that he wasn’t going to live, and it doesn’t matter that we knew his twin sister would. The ache in my heart is always there. I am sad. But I am more concerned about my sister. She seems to be mad at God. I know that God has a plan, but I feel like with all the mean things and evil that happens in the world, his precious life was nothing but pure love. How can I help my sister cope? She doesn’t talk about it, and we have now run 2 5k’s in celebration of his life. I guess I feel like those two hours are the closest two hours to pure love anyone is ever going to feel. I always feel so guilty that I wasn’t there. I mean, I tried, I live 5 hours away and it was so quick, I didn’t have a chance to get there. I just needed to get it off my chest that I am mad at myself for not being there for that precious angel’s life, and passing. I did get to hold him, and touch his beautiful hair. I know that if my heart is hurting this bad, my sister’s is hurting so much more.

How does she explain this to his twin sister? Is she always going to feel like a part of her is missing? I fear she might spend the rest of her life seeking something that she will never ever be able to find.

I do not want the grief to ever go away, because it reminds me to think of him daily. To remember his beautiful little body and love him unconditionally.

Shan <3 said 10 years, 7 months ago:

I have a friend who is a twin and her twin sister passed away when they were 3 when she was accidentally run over by her father. I know for a fact that my friend doesn’t dwell nor harbor harsh feelings towards her father for their loss. In fact it motivates her to achieve the many achievements she has in sports.

Now obviously different people deal with grief differently, but as long as her mother, your sister, is there to support and love her unconditionally then she won’t let this sad loss hold her back when she is older.

I think the only thing you can do is be there for her when she does feel the need to talk or just cry. Too many people nowadays imply that when someone loses someone close you have to be strong for them but I find it more comforting when the person supporting me is sitting their crying too, so I know I am not alone.

You sound like a fantastic sister, worrying about her and supporting her, I’m sure you will be a fantastic aunty to her daughter as well Chin up love.