Sara said 8 years, 4 months ago:

Yesterday I had a training day at work, before starting one of the next topics, she had us doing an activity. We drew a flower and it had 5 petals. I can’t remember the other 2, but 3 of the petals represented comfort, occupation and identity. I had no idea what to write for any of them but eventually I understood and wrote ‘carer’ for occupation as I am a care worker for the elderly. Comfort, if I were to answer honestly, I would have written food, so I wrote my next comfort, which is watching series on my computer. I left identity last. I had no idea what to write and this is nothing knew. I never really had a true sense of who I was as a person and somehow this being brought to my attention in this way, I cried. I had no idea what to write and I just felt ‘finished’. I felt done and I just broke into tears. But the last couple of months, it really hasn’t taken much for me to cry. I cry at anything these days and I feel ridiculous when it happens. So maybe it’s to do with losing confidence, I don’t know. I just keeping having this ‘done’ feeling and I don’t really know what to do about it.

Maddie said 8 years, 4 months ago:

@sararizzles Sometimes our self worth and confidence slips away before we ever notice it has gone missing. Sometimes we found ourselves in hopeless situations, and that feeling of not having answers makes us lose even more self worth.

But let’s just be clear about one thing: NOBODY has all the answers.

And it is absolutely okay for you not to know yourself the way you wish you did. It’s okay not to have an identity that you can instantly pinpoint. Honeslty, I would find it a little silly if you could. We’re made up of so many attributes, that picking apart the combination can be difficult. Sometimes we’re so used to ourselves that we don’t feel like anything stands out.

I don’t know whether or not this would help, but next time someone asks for your identity, and you don’t know what to say, write your name. Or the name of something you enjoy. Or a color. If they ask, tell them it’s a secret. Or write that you have yet to figure it out. Give yourself some leeway. Breathe. You don’t need to have all the answers.

When I feel ‘done’ I read about other people’s experiences. I’ve tried a lot of ways to motivate myself. I read, I write, I exercise, I draw, I sing, I play instruments, I play video games, I eat, I don’t eat. If it’s not the norm for you to feel this way, then perhaps reading about other things will lift your spirits. Or just getting it off your chest.

If you constantly feel tired, or done, perhaps it has something to do with your body. Are you familiar with adrenal fatigue? (I am by no means a doctor, but I will help in whatever way I can to help you work through it.)