Joe Ashton said 7 years, 7 months ago:

Do you know that feeling when your trying to impresss someone and you fail? How it makes your stomach drop, and your body is stiff, and you feel so small and insignificant. Now you know when your depressed and you feel like you could burst into tear at any minute. Imagine those combined all the time all day every day. Being lonley is a struggle. My parents aren’t compationate. They see crying, or being exited, or not being able to keep secrets as a weakness. I’ve learned never to cry or let my voice shake infront of them. I have to lie constantly. If im exited I have to keep a poker face. Emotion is taboo in my household. Sometimes I wonder what heaven is like, but I don’t want to find out for fear of non existing. I have two sissters but im alone all the time. I don’t feel free to be myself. I paint and write but whenever I try to create something beutiful it turns to darkness. My parnts are negative. they will give me a compliment but it’s alwas followed by a but. Basically this is a big story about all the reasons my life sucks. No it’s not a story it’s reality. And reality has fucked me.

kakaka said 7 years, 7 months ago:

I am afraid I will always be alone too. My heart is breaking from my partner cheating and leaving. The one person I thought would be on my side no matter what. Three years and a 2 yr old son later and he does this to me. I will never trust anyone again and feel like he has ruined my life.

-psychedelic90- said 7 years, 7 months ago:

Hi @Joe Ashton,

I’ve read what you’ve put and I can relate to this. There was this one time I was in my first year at college and I had no one to speak to or vent my feelings of loneliness to.

Regarding what you’ve said, do you have any friends that you can speak to about this (a close friend at school/work/college)? Have you tried speaking to your sisters about it?

I’m here if you need to talk.
Jess

Madea said 7 years, 7 months ago:

I am too. I feel like no one will ever want to love me.

Oli said 7 years, 7 months ago:

I’m here for each and every one of you guys, you guys are not alone, stay strong, you will make it through this, keep your head up, if you need to talk or need a friend, I’m always here (hugs)

Oli said 7 years, 7 months ago:

You are all beautiful and amazing people (hugs) Never give up :)

MarjaElisa said 7 years, 7 months ago:

Hey Joe Ashton, I totally relate to you. I have always felt like it’s forbidden to show any feelings in my family, so I have learned to hide them. Especially if I felt sad and cried, they couldn’t handle it. I’m just trying to keep my poker face. Now my father died, and my mother doesn’t even care how I feel.

So I understand how you feel, and you can talk to me too if you want :)

Marja