LnJ said 9 years, 10 months ago:

Hey everybody.
I am chatting with a woman almost 2 years now. We have fun and we like each other, not only as friends. But she is married. I don’t think she is unhappy in her marriage, she is just imprisoned in her marriage routine, while at the same time she is attracted to me. We have met twice, and we made out once. Of course, I do not expect her to be in relationship with me, but I want to proceed to something more. She told me that she wants it too, but she is afraid of feeling guilty is she do something more with me. And the last days the atmosphere is somewhat “down” for both sides, since she expressed her fears about possible guilt feeling. But I want something more, I can’t she her as a friend. Our conversations these 2 years were dependent more on romantic words and expressions and less in friendly things. And as a result now, we do not have much to say, since she expressed her guilt fears. We talk a little friendly, and that’s all.

So, I had a thought.
If i would tell her to stop chatting, to delete my phone number etc, wouldn’t this make her afraid of losing me and as result to help her stop being scared of possible guilt?
Or it would make her think “ok, if he wants me to delete his number and stop talking/chatting, fine” and I would lose her?

This is my dilemma.
I would appreciate if you could respond with your honest opinion.
Thank you

The Drive said 9 years, 10 months ago:

My honest opinion on this? First, it is already wrong because you know she’s already happily married but still you let those things happened.

When you started feeling differently towards, you should have avoided her already. It could save you from all these, and her marriage too.

rinseandrep said 9 years, 10 months ago:

It sounds like manipulating her into sleeping with you, and that’s not going to help her with the guit afterwards. If you want to cut contact, do it to move on and get out of something that is going nowhere like you should, not because the thought of losing her escapism device might tip her into doing something she in uncomfortable with.