Cait said 10 years, 2 months ago:

So me and my ex broke up last March, and we basically stopped talking after i got a new boyfriend in April, and we haven’t talked since. Lately, for some reason, i’ve found myself missing him. Not in a romantic way, but we were really good friends before/while we were going out, and i miss his friendship a lot. I’m still with my boyfriend from april, so i’m not sure if reaching out to him is a good idea (even if it is just as a friends) for multiple reasons. One, what if he has no interests in being friends anymore? Two, what if my current bf has a problem with it? What if the friendship goes south just like the relationship did? Keep in mind that it’s almost a year since we broke up and we’ve talked maybe twice…

Liz said 10 years, 2 months ago:

I had the same issue. For instance this one guy I went out with, we dated for 2 months and we both thought the relationship was not going too well. Just hope that your ex has realized that you weren’t working out and it’s time to move on. But you also have to realize that you have totally moved on. It will also help if your bf is there helping you get through this. He may not approve but then he will at least know what’s going on.

becausemeagan said 10 years, 2 months ago:

In my opinion I think you want some closure from your ex. Maybe you don’t realize it because when we tend to find someone good for is we tend to want to fix our flaws of our past. And, as for is it a good idea…well again in my opinion I don’t think it is. I tried going down that road before and my boyfriend did not like that. He also put it in perspective for me. That’s just opinion but most times it doesn’t go the way you think.

SamBurke said 10 years, 2 months ago:

I can tell you it’s possible: I’m actually best friends with my Ex, and there isn’t a problem at all. BUT, and this is a big huge but, there are some special circumstances.

We parted as a mutual agreement that we were horrible as partners, but great as friends. We’d started out as friends, and tried to move up, and it didn’t work.

Second, we gave each other a ton of space first: I spent about 4 months not talking to her, ever, just to make sure there weren’t going to be issues.

Third, she’s found the perfect guy for her, and me the perfect girl. Which means that we really don’t have issues talking, or getting advice.

So, the things I think are necessary? 1. A removal of previous attachment. You can’t be friends with someone if you’ve still got pain from loving them. 2. Something preventing future attachment. Be that distance, new SOs, mutual agreement, or as I’d advise, several things, you need a way to make sure your friendship stays friendly. No benefits, no strings, just friends.

That’s my opinion at least!

junichiroe said 10 years, 2 months ago:

Well I guess it depends but well I have found an pain from seeing the people of whom use to be more turn into people who are less and being reminded it could have been more.

helpful lover said 10 years, 2 months ago:

you can be friends with an ex.. it is possible. my ex and i have a very complicated history and he is a complete asshole, but he was also one of my best friends at a time. so it may take a while to get to the comfortable friend stage but it is definitely possible!