Deleted User said 8 years, 11 months ago:

How old were you when your parents split? Did they wait for you to be older, or divorce when you were young? I’m interested in how children experience divorce differently depending on their age.

Deleted User said 8 years, 11 months ago:

My father died before my parents could divorce. I was 15.

Kirstin Lopez said 8 years, 11 months ago:

I think it’s always easier the sooner it’s done.
My parents were not very stable and off and on and officially broke up when I was in 6th grade. I wasn’t surprised I was actually relieved So maybe it’s different for people not only depending on age but depending on how their parents approach it.

I always tell my younger friends and co-workers that have infants and also have ongoing relationship problems that they need to make a decision by the time the kid is about 3, so that it doesn’t get attached to the idea of them being together and have memories of any arguments or any serious confusion. That way it will grow up jsut knowing that that’s how things are and wont have some big transition and need of closure.

I think that the later it happens the more shocking it is because you think your parents are supposed to love one another and you’re used to them as a married couple, bonding over family events so the shock has to pass and all the stages need to be struggled with before acceptance and it’s more difficult for all parties involved.

Deleted User said 8 years, 11 months ago:

I was in grade 8 when they divorced but they should have when I was in grade 4. My dad was an alcoholic and miserable to live with. I wish she had done it in grade 3 or 4.

Deleted User said 8 years, 11 months ago:

I was 12, I was even partially blamed!! :( It’s all water under the bridge now, and at the time I tried to skate over it. Now I realise how much it affected me deeply, and my own views on my own marriage now, and how I hope my kids never feel the way I did.

thelostteenfromlongisland said 8 years, 11 months ago:

I was 3 years old, and Im still experiencing the affects today and Im 16.

seeingblind said 8 years, 11 months ago:

I’m not really sure exactly how old I was maybe 4 or 5 but either way it was extremely difficult for me and I am still effected by it on a daily basis I am now 16 and switch houses every week my view on marriage has been altered due to this and I don’t know that I want kids because I don’t want them to have to go through the pain that I have suffered for so many years. Divorce can and will take a toll on the children involved. :(

HeadlineOWLS said 8 years, 11 months ago:

I was 7 so I didn’t exactly understand what was entirely going on, I just thought we were buying a new house and my stuff was being moved.
I eventually understood and found it hard for the first few years but I now I’ve talked about it and understand what happened.
It’s not as much as a sensitive subject for me now as it was back then, that’s for sure.

Resa said 8 years, 11 months ago:

I was two so I don’t actually remember it. Apparently, I knew that something was going to happen so I ran to my dad and told him that I loved him before he left. It was a little bit of an emotional moment for my family. I think it’s better that my parents did it because it was very hard to see them argue and it probably would have been harder for me if I was old enough to remember or understand.

Nettles44 said 8 years, 11 months ago:

I was two. I don’t have any memories of my parents living together, and I didn’t really process it until I was 15. I still struggle with it from time to time.

carmen said 8 years, 11 months ago:

My parents were never married, my father was around 26 years old and my mother was 19 years old at the time when she learned she was pregnant with me. I was born after she turned 20. My family has told me that my nobody ever liked my biological father, he always treated my mom badly, took advantage of her… Before I turned a year old, my mom got pregnant with my little brother. After he turned 1, my dad decided he didn’t want to be with us anymore. He went up to my mother and said, “Hey, I’m going to Paraguay (the country that i am from). Do you want to come with me?” My mom argued and said,”Absolutely not, i want to stay here and raise the kids where they can have better opportunities.” My parents were immigrants, and so my dad said, “Alright, see ya.” He sold the house in which he lived in, sold my mother’s car, and left two of his children homeless and broke on the street. He’s never came back to the United States since and refuses to come because he’s afraid of paying the child support that he owes. He left us, I am now 14 years old, my mother has never told me the story about my dad, it’s aunts and uncles and grandparents who do that for me..we were abandoned and I hope one day he sees his mistakes and tries to pay and make up for them, for my little brother and I..
Thank you for taking the time to read this. I genuinely appreciate it.

Introvert said 8 years, 8 months ago:

My parents waited to divorce until I was 19. They thought about it before, but decided they would wait until I was older so I might be able to handle it better and/or not have to go through the whole deal of living in two different households. I like how they did it because now I’m able to see why they’re getting the divorce and I’m fine with it, whereas before I would be completely confused and not know what to think.

Jess said 8 years, 8 months ago:

My Mum and sperm-doner split, but they weren’t married, when I was 6 months old and he ran away from the responsibility of being a father with his tail between his legs.

Charlie said 8 years, 8 months ago:

I honestly don’t know…

My parents were always the same when they acted when my sister and I are present but my mother moved us both to a new place six years ago. Every time all of us are in the same place now, they always acted the same as before. I’m not ignorant of how they are with each other but, in every memory I could remember, neither of them had been wearing their rings. And that was before we moved. They’ve been married, I’m sure, cause I’ve seen the documents and the pictures of the wedding day, but I don’t know if there had been divorce papers. I’m positive that they’ve over for years but neither of them has confessed.

I’ve already assumed that they are divorced the moment it was planned for us to move. The exact date however, is a mystery that I do not want to solve…

foreverrsearching said 8 years, 7 months ago:

I was 17 years old when my parents splitt it (it’s been 1,5 year now) It effected me sooo much.

I couldn’t see it coming because my parents never fought. They more started living “next to each other” instead of with each other. When my dad told me, he was moving out. I was so shocked. Because I had so many problems at school and my home was my saven heaven. The place that I loved and then everything fell apart. I was totally broken by it. I couldn’t believe it.

I still think they could have made it work. If HE HAD MADE AN EFFORT TO FIX THINGS.
Instead of doing that. He found love with someone else.

And he didn’t even tell me he had someone else. He blabbed something about growing apart. I was so angry at my dad for doing this to me.

I think they could have made it work for 3 more years or so. Then I would have moved out to study and I would have been older and not in my puberty anymore and I think that would have been better.

My mom was broken. And all the pain she felt she outed it on us and I was terrible.

I saw my mom broke down several times and I don’t need to tell you what that does to you right?

I disgusted my dad but I still loved him. I still miss the band I used to had with my parents.

I have distanted myself from them. But I have accepted them not being together anymore. I’ve also accepted my dad’s gf. Which I hated at first :)

It changed my view on marriage. I don’t want to get married and if I have childern I don’t want them to go through something like this.