Conflicted said 9 years, 7 months ago:

Hi guys. I recently got out of a long term relationship and I have no idea how to just go out and meet someone. I’ve never traied online dating and I’m much to shy of a guy to just go out and randomly hit on girls at bars. I don’t like doing that anyway I think it’s creepy :. I’ve always been the nice romantic long relationship kind of guy. If you guys could give me any help I would really appreciate it.

Actually_Wacky said 9 years, 7 months ago:

You can always go out with friends and have them introduce you to some of their girl friends. Just expand your social circle. You don’t necessarily have to go out with the mentality of “picking up girls”. Just go out. Have fun. Meet new people. In clubs, restaurants, at the gym, at the library, at the frozen yogurt place, at the grocery store…anywhere really. Just don’t be afraid to go up and say hi :)

Conflicted said 9 years, 7 months ago:

thats always my issue I feel creepy just rolling up and being like heyyyy

Actually_Wacky said 9 years, 7 months ago:

I understand. It’s completely normal! You’re out of practice.

I know this is just one girl’s perspective but, I love talking to people and as long as the person is respectful I will say hi back and talk for a little bit. There is nothing wrong with that :) That’s how you meet people.

Now there are some girls who are rude and will not give you the time of day. But don’t take this personally. It has more to do with them than it does with you! Don’t let this discourage you and keep trying :)

Threadfall said 9 years, 7 months ago:

This is easier said than done, but sometimes it’s easier to find someone when you’re not looking for it.

I’m not saying give up, I’m saying that instead of focusing on finding someone, just get into activities you enjoy, and try to join groups that do these things together. You’ll meet a lot of people with similar interests, and the likelihood of meeting someone who likes the same things you do or that you just “click” with gets much higher :)

I guess this is just a slightly different way of saying what other commenters have, but this is my two cents. Good luck!

asder said 9 years, 7 months ago:

they do not exist

Aerial Faith said 9 years, 7 months ago:

I don’t wanna cause a stir but ‘good’ girls do exist, contrary to the above commenter’s beliefs. c: I agree with Threadfall, try do more of what you love and stop actively looking for someone, and you’re more likely to be surprised. Join a club that you’re interested in, try something new!

Conflicted said 9 years, 7 months ago:

Thank you all for your awesome advice. I have been doing my best to find myself again and just do me. I have heard the advice of just do whatever it is I do but the issue is all I do is work and well sleep mostly. My job is all encompassing I work at a 24 hr juvenile detention center so I tend to be there.. well a lot. So finding a girl in that social circle is not only hard but can be a minefield due to sexual harassment and what not. I also know I need to do things to help myself which is where my conflict lies. I’ll keep the faith though and I have to disagree there are good girls out there just as there are good guys you just have to look.

Deleted User said 9 years, 6 months ago:

Hi Conflicted,
I understand this is a bit of an old thread. Actively looking for a girl friend is almost never a good idea. Like many here said, it is better to invest time in your likes. We can never expect somebody else to complete us. When you do things you like, you will come across girls in that field with whom you will have more in common with.

Bar scene is not too good as the culture there is usually not for someone looking for a long term relationship.

In terms of dating sites, I hear the paid ones are good as people tend to be more serious in there.

Good luck