SomethingForAlways said 9 years, 6 months ago:

So, I met this guy through my best friends. They were coworkers and she kept teasing both of us to get to know one another.. Well, it finally happened after I went to see a local show he was acting in, with my friend. We had a little small talk, added each other on facebook, and finally swapped numbers. From there we talked about 3-4 times a week, mostly sending each other funny pictures, random buzzfeed articles, just basic things. I visit the office a couple of times to see my friend and made small talk with him there as well. A couple week later, we both go over to my friend’s boyfriends house and hangout with them, a little cuddling occurs between us, but nothing major. We continue chatting, talk about hanging out, but he is rehearsing for two shows and doesn’t have too much time. A few weeks later, we go to another mutual friends show.. Afterwards we go to a bar, and long story short, 7 beers later I’m going home with him. Sex happened, and it was fine. We chit chatted a bit after, he told me that he’s a child of divorce, getting close to people scares him, he doesn’t have a lot of friends because he doesn’t like to socialize too much, he doesn’t even let people come over often because he views his room as an sanctuary.. just all this personal stuff… well another couple weeks go by, we talk about 2-3 times a week, nothing weird.. well we end up at a party together and I asked him what was going on between us… he says he’s interested, but not sure if he wants to pursue anything yet, needs to get to know me better… no big deal… well then communication kind of dies off…. we start talking once a week… then once every two weeks… this happens for about two months… Then out of the blue I start getting daily text messages at the beginning of September, full on conversations, some silly, some serious, telling me about life, rehearsals, family, work, really great stuff… this goes on for a while… Last Friday I went over his house to hang out and watch movies…. Sex happens again, neither of us are drunk, it happens again in the morning, and it’s nice. Very intimate, fun conversations, virtually perfect… but now I feel him growing distant again… I like him a lot, we just really click, it’s almost effortless when we’re together… but I can’t decide if he just only wants to sleep with me.. or if he actually is interested… Is this a lost cause? Should I wait it out?

rinseandrep said 9 years, 6 months ago:

You can let him know that you don’t want to spend another two months of radio silence, and tell him how you want to be treated as of now if he wants you to stay in his life as more than a friend.
His parents’ divorce sounds like an excuse he uses to behave how he likes.

Kitsu said 9 years, 4 months ago:

I would stop the sex right now, for one. It seems like every time that happens, he pushes away from you. If you want him, wait until he wants to be with you to continue with the sexual aspect of the relationship. You are giving him everything he wants with no commitment. He has no need to commit. Change that.