Why do I like him?

0

There’s this guy at school who I kept having a crush on, on-and-off. He was overall a friendly funny guy, but was super confident and outgoing, while I am the opposite- super shy and self conscious. This guy was always giving me attention and talking to me, but I never knew how to respond because I always felt nervous and assumed he was joking around with me. For a while, I felt almost obsessed with him and thought about him all the time, wondering if he did the same with me. But as I learned more about him, i realized that he had tons of other friends and probably didnt pay any attention to me. I have since learned that he wasnt as great of a guy as I thought he was, but for some reason I still feel drawn to him and really nervous around him. I dont know if I’m nervous just because it’s a social situation or because I may have feelings for him. I just wish I didn’t like him anymore! What makes it even harder is that my friends are always teasing me telling me how he “obviously” likes me even though I know he doesn’t. How can I get over this guy who doesnt even care about me and I dont even want to like. I think I was just drawn to him because he was the only guy who payed any mind to me at all lol. Help!

Category: asked August 13, 2013

4 Answers

1
accepted
I don't really think there's a way to really get over someone. You could Distract yourself by doing stuff that gets your mind off him or just breaking all conversation with him. It's easier said than done. But what I really wanted to say is that maybe you should have more confidence in yourself. He could like you but maybe you're too self conscious to see that. And like I said before, it's easier said than done. I hope I helped at least a bit.
2
Oh sweet heart! i know the feeling. 4 steps to getting over a guy you've never dated. 1) look at his flaws, i never promote negativity or bring people down but watch him. some with bother you (bad use of English, grabs himself, horrible jock laugh there's something i promise) 2) MOVIE NIGHT!!!!! bring your best friend watch a million and one chick flicks but the old ones are always better (IDK how old you are so i don't want to get you in trouble but anything with Drew Berrymore, Sandra Bullock, Huge Grant, and new school Kathrine Hegil, Zooey deschanel. this will sound odd but go to netflix and watch any gay romance movie [personal favorites Is It Just Me or E-Cupid] all of these movies are sure to help) 3) change your image, but not the way the average person things. every time i realize someone is a total waste of my time, i change something about myself. I wear a new shade or design of make up, i cut my hair different (on the plus side, if you did want him he could like you with the change, wear eyeliner or something that always works.) or stop doing something, if you wear your hair down every day where it up and vise versa. change it up. 4) fine a new group of people to watch, there's all kinds of cliques to hang out with. just because hes in the big popular one doesn't mean he is having the most fun.
1
There is no direct way to get over someone, especially someone that you like as much as you do. Try to distance yourself from him, find other things to focus on, spend more time with your friends. Tell your friends you're trying to get over him, so they stop the teasing and help you to get your mind off of him. Just remember there's others out there, and more guys to come. Good luck!
1
It's almost impossible for someone to really tell whether or not someone likes you. Its easy to tell when someone likes another person, but nowhere near as easy for yourself. If you really don't want him to know you like him, then I'd suggest distracting yourself somehow, talk to your friends and tell them you don't want to go out with him, and say you don't want to be reminded of him anymore. Then try to stop any thoughts that are about him.
However, if you still wanted to give him a chance, next time you speak, try to build up the courage to ask "Hey, we could text sometime, if it's ok?". If he is interested and friendly he will probably actively encourage it, and you could text while apart. try to be as friendly and as funny as you can, even if you're nervous. After a while, at best a few weeks of active texting, tell him you might like him. He may not feel the same, but hopefully by that point you can be friends and continue texting! With this method it's easier to make a friend and maybe get a boyfriend at the same time.

However, if you are afraid he may hurt you, or you worry he does anything hurtful or illegal, it would be best to avoid him altogether, regardless of how friendly he is. Nothing is worth putting your own safety or mental health in jeopardy.

Good luck!