i hate everything! 2013 has been the worst year of my life so far. Right now i have no friends at all. i did make some friends but they used me and then they had no use of me and dumped me as there friends. a bunch of personal stuff also happened to me with my extended family. they left so many scars in my heart. I also fight also with my Mom. i failed half of my semester. my grandfather is on the verge of dying. i feel so lost! Why is it that i am so alone? you’d think just this once life would start getting better, but it only gets worse. i am really depressed right now. my counsiler doesn’t understand me, my parents don’t understand me and i don’t have any friends to talk to! i feel like i am just a lost cause. i’m not meant to be happy. am i just a tool for people to use? somebody help me out of this mess! i hate waking up because i have to go to school and i hate going to sleep because i know tomorrow wont be any better! why can’t i be happy. what have i ever done to deserve this?
i’m sorry you have to deal with me…thank you for listening….
Well life isn't exactly meant to happy especially at this time, in fact pretty much this part of life is the worst part of life. But think of the positives, like you never mentioned your dad, are you two going well? Try to find a hobby, it may sound pretty much what EVERYONE says to you when you ask, but doing it is hard, but it works.
For your friends, there was a quote I'll put in my own words. It was along the lines of "it's better to be alone rather than be in bad company." Feel glad that you aren't with those friends! They weren't treating you poorly, you were treating yourself poorly. Try finding a new counselor, and if your mother doesn't approve, do it in secret. It doesn't matter, what matters is the state of mind you have to be in. As for feeling like a tool, I was alone for the last year, too. I found friends of mine a grade above in a school club. Do things that create opportunity to make a friend. I became friends with my current friend by picking up her pencil and striking up a conversation! You aren't a tool for them to use. Don't feel bad for having people open the door and slamming it in their face.
this probably won't be helpful but i have the same problem:
i just left my friends because they were always making fun of me and making me miserable and my grandparents aren't in good health and my sister's having problems too and i want to help her but she drives me crazy and i feel like a terrible sister! and my grades went down, i gained weight, i have a freakish need to eat my feelings away even if i will hate myself for it two seconds after! and it's JUST not getting any better because now i've been sick nonstop for a month with a fever, a stomach flu... but i heard that the lower you go down the higher you'll bounce, so hey maybe our lives are gona be AWESOME sometime in the future!