i grew up as a Catholic, but going to church and praying would never work for me. I wanted to kill myself when i was younger because I felt like I didnt belong in this world.. I lived my life feeling horrible because I was a sinner and would always do bad things. I was raised to believe that I can go to hell if I don’t ask God for forgiveness. Today, I feel that is one of the most cruel things you can tell anyone !
why should I believe that after suffering here for so many reasons, when I die I am going to suffer in hell?? after years of trying and trying to have the same beliefs as my family I felt like I didnt want to pray because I never felt like I can ‘feel’ god. I felt like no matter how much I cried and prayed to him he’d never listen..
In school I enjoyed science and always questioned my religion because of all the things I learned.. about 2-3 months ago, I began researching Buddhism and I feel I have finally found something I can spiritually relate to. I am hoping to one day meet a modern day Buddhist to teach me the proper way to meditate and more about their beliefs. All I know is from google and youtube and I finally feel like there is hope and I don’t have to always feel like this horrible person who is going to suffer in jail
if all of the religious texts were brought together and you were to create a list of the things people will go to "hell" for, i can honestly tell you that is where everyone would be going. so you might as well enjoy yourself while you are here and try to find a text you identify with. I personally don't need some book of guidelines because I know that people suffer in those books, there is so much suffering and I want to ease it. thats what i live for. not some code of conduct. if i go to hell, i could care less. i identify as agnostic.
I've been through so many religions but the fact is that none of them are ME. None of them are fully what i believe. There have been a few religions that I can relate to a lot but none are what i fully believe so I've chosen to be atheist until i find a religion i can believe in. I hope this is your religion and congratulations on finding one you can truly belong to :)
I say be who you are. You know when you find what fulfills you. I know being Buddhist May not be convenient, if you you live in the southern us especially. I do and grew up being told I would go to hell for not being a Christian. I was raised semi Christian but I know I believe in a different religion now. I hope you get the courage to be yourself. Don't wait. Find the way to do it now.
I have believe in my faith because whenever I followed an inspired truth it always turns out to be really true. Not everyone can rely solely on a religious doctrine and get something out of their religion. Sometimes you have to read other books to widen your horizon. Reading the autobiographies of people for me has helped me to be more able to connect to what the doctrine actually teaches. You cannot depend on a doctrine to keep you happy unless you put it to the test.