What to do about my fear of social judgement?


This is my first time being here. I don’t know what I can do about it. I always have that feeling that people are criticizing me in their thoughts. I tried to meet new people, especially in anime conventions. Somehow every time I try to, I get very nervous and hide somewhere crying. It was very hard. Some of my friends doesn’t realize this because they never see me by myself in public. I told my sister but she sounds like she doesn’t believe me at all. I want to meet new friends but what good will do if I’ll end up breaking down in tears?

Tags: asked November 20, 2014

3 Answers

if you go tell a homophopic person that you're gay, then be ready to be judged. :) But not everyone judges. There is a famous quote from Dr. Seuss: Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.You'll meet people that don't mind (your mistakes, blunders, quirks etc.) and those will be the ones for you who really matter, who are really important in your life.Don't let others bring you down saying bad things about you, cuz they don't know you and you know you're not doing anything wrong. But if you think they might be right, try to do something about it instead of crying. Best wishes...
We all go through this kind of anxiety all the time, I know I do. What I do is tell myself, NEVER ASSUME, NEVER OVERTHINK THINGS!
Based from my experience, I had to admit to myself that my paranoia about other people talking about me behind my back comes from overthinking and assuming. I always assumed that people dont like me in the beginning so I'll never fit in with them. In the end, I end up depressed because of these grim thoughts.
But now that I think of it, I dont need to fit in, I am different and I will always be weird, that's who I am. Also, other people have their own lives to live and worry about. They would have to put a lot of effort to give a part of their day just to judge you. Even if they do, you know your own person. Who cares what they think?
At the end of the day we both know YOU have the power of your own thought. Let's say people do critic you, but as do they do others. You are not the focus of anyone at the end of it all. You don't depend on aproval. At the end of it all YOUR life will be what you make of it with this fear you disable the possibilities by cornering yourself. If you feel there are things you need to work on to be accepted, then do so. Be happy, instead of rushing into a corner just step out of your shell and smile in there face. A haters worst nightmare is to see their unwitting thoughts have no effect on you. Pop into your mind an uplifting song. For example Firework by Katy Perry. This will help you snap out of that negative mindset of what you think that they think. Which at the end of the day may not even be the case. BEST THING. Take a deep breath and shake it off. Smile and say it's Ok I got this :D!