What should your “number” be?


I’m just getting different opinions because when you search it on Google, it’ll say the average is 11 sexual partners. What do you think it should be?

I mean everyone wants it to be low, but I mean once it happens you can’t take it back.

Why can guys have more than girls but girls are still “sluts”?

Category: Tags: asked February 13, 2014

8 Answers

Women are not defined by their ability to get pregnant. Women are human beings with feelings and sexual appetites. Everyone is entitled to sleep with as many or as few people as they wish, it's not any more "unsanitary" than kissing, and "sleeping around" is NOT disrespectful to yourself, you are not an object and you do not lose value the more sexual partners you have, the same way you are not better than other people morally because you were a virgin until marriage. If you respect your own wishes, you are respecting yourself. Your worth is not based on who you choose to have sex with and when you choose to have sex. The reason virginity and "numbers" are bad things for women is because women are still objectified and value is placed on their worth as a sex object.
If your partner has an issue with your sexual past that is not related to whether or not you have a disease they could contract, your partner is jealous and insecure, which is their problem, not yours.
Be safe and be true to yourself and your beliefs, that's what matters.
Hmm as you get older the whole slut thing isn't so prevalent. It depends on what you are comfortable with. If you feel comfortable dating around and trying out a bunch of people, then that's fine, but if you don't then that's fine too. I think it's truly a personal thing and we shouldn't base who we sleep on an average number. Do what makes you happy. Besides, you don't have to tell anyone your number anyway. It's your business, just be true to yourself.
You're past doesn't define you. A number of sexual partners doesn't define you. So what if you regret some, or even all of the people you have been with. You can't change it, so don't dwell on it. In the end, you'll find someone who cares about YOU, and if a stupid number is going to come between that, then it's not real love. People will always judge, no matter what, so if you want to have several partners and don't want to be judged, then only tell people you trust. I've been called a slut many times, and it always stings, but after the hurt goes away, you realize who your true friends are.
I agree with tiger lily on this one. You choose who you wish to have sexual intercourse with. Again, whom you choose to do it with is your business. I feel like the "slut" thing is a bit of a juvenile word. I don't think there should be a "standard number" on the situation. Everyone is different. Everyone has their own beliefs. What matters is that (like tiger lily said), you are true to yourself. If you feel that having numerous sexual partners is being true to yourself, so be it. Just as if you choose to have 0 or 1 partners. Don't let others try to tell you what you may/may not be doing is wrong. Just because people have their own opinion (which they're entitled to) doesn't always mean its right nor that you have to believe it. Listen to your mind and your heart.
Sex is a physical act between two people. You chose to have sex, most of the times, with each partner. Why is it anyone's business about who you have sex with? Why should there be a "number" of acceptable partners?

Of course done with proper care and consideration the risks of disease and unwanted pregnancy goes down incredibly. You have to respect your body in your own way. It is your life and it is your decision and no one should change that.

Furthermore, your future spouse or current partner, if they have a problem with your past is clearly not someone accepting enough of your life style. Find people in your life who are going coordinate with your ideas.
because people can be shallow, caddy, and blind
Sex is sex, isn't it? It's ultimately an agreement you and your partner/s have made and the act resulting thereof. What do numbers have anything to do with it? I (along with many others here) don't see the point in keeping score or making it some kind of a warped, ego-based competition. It's okay--you don't have to worry about such superficial, insignificant things. After all, it's your life and it's your decision to have sex whenever and with whomever. Others can't really dictate your life for you--for example, set up minimums or maximums for the number of people for you to have sex with. Finally, there's no need to compare your life and choices with others' because you are an individual whose life is expected to be different from other people. Have a great day! :) -Ravvi
I have no inherent desire to have a low number of sex partners. Once I broke two hands, I stopped keeping count. Once I realized how double-standard it was, I deliberately put it out of mind.