Please, please, seek help. Find a therapist if at all possible. Speaking as someone in recovery from an eating disorder, I can tell you that eating disorders are hell. You may lose weight, but that's not all you lose. You lose your life. If you don't lose it literally (eating disorders DO kill), you lose it in every other way possible. You lose friends, you lose health, you lose dreams, you lose hope, you lose energy, you lose your will to get out of bed in the morning. It is not the route to take to lose weight. And, as your weight--knowing only your weight and height--is healthy for your height, I suspect the real issue at hand here is body dissatisfaction and emotional stuff that needs to be dealt with. You need to address your mental health, not your weight. From what you have said, you are already on a very slippery slope. Please try and get help as soon as possible to try and prevent this from spiraling out of control. Anorexia and other eating disorders do not make you happier with your body. Even at my lowest weight--what was considered "anorexic" on the BMI--I was unhappy with my body. This is not the way you want to go. Trust me.