Should I take a risky chance?


So my best friend (who’s a girl, and I’m a girl too) just confessed to me yesterday, and I think I like her back. I told my mom about it and she said she’ll love me no matter what decision I make. However, she said I should think about my decision for a while and weight out my options. She’s worried that I will get made fun of in high school and that my friends might abandon me (which I highly doubt, since the majority of them are bisexual). I really want to experience new things and see what my feelings are.

I’ve been thinking about it, and I realize that I really do like her (gender doesn’t appeal to me what so ever in her case, I love her the way she is) and that I want to say yes. I am, however, some what afraid that my mom won’t let us have sleep overs together and plan our costumes for a convention we’re going to (In fear that we’ll touch each other or something, but I’m not interested in that tbh).

I have this all planned out (I think I thought over it really well.) So we’ll keep the relationship private at some sorts and won’t go announcing to everyone that we’re dating and won’t have any sort of public affection (holding hands, kissing, etc. it’s annoying when couples do that anyway so). If the time comes, however, when one of our friends or something asks if we’re dating we’ll just say yes and act as though it’s nothing. Also, before we even began dating, I was thinking of telling her that if things don’t work out I don’t want any hatred between us, that I still want to be her friend even if we didn’t click or something like that.

I really don’t know what to do… Should I say yes to her confession and ask her out? Or no?

Category: Tags: asked February 2, 2015

3 Answers

I think this is onw of the sweetest posts I've read in a while and you should go for it. Keeping the relationship discreet at first sounds like a good idea to me: it's very new for you and you'll probably need some private space to discover and understand your feelings and the new kind of relation growing between you two. I think your mom sounds open-minded and, although it's possible she might need some time to adapt to the situation, I'm sure she won't see this as a problem. Communication is key and you've already done the hard part so keep talking to her so ther is no misunderstanding and everything goes smooth.
I think it's really great that you are so open minded and recognize that you can love a person no matter their gender. I totally agree with Silent Radiance in that you should do what feels right. The only thing I would like to add is that you can love someone in a completely nonsexual way. I noticed you said you weren't really interested in touching each other, and that's fine! I would think about that a little more though. Do you love her as a friend or do you love her in a romantic way? I really love my best friend (we're both girls too). I would live the rest of my life with her, but I wouldn't have sex with her because I happen to be straight. Romance tends to infer some degree of sexual attraction. At the very least I would have a discussion with your friend about what you expect the relationship will be like so the two of you are on the same page. I hope you relationship with your friend turns out however you want it to. Best of luck!
Thank you for your answers everyone. You helped me make a very important decision in my life :)