Not happy with listener does any one else get this isnt right?

That sounds like a rude convo, next time disconnect sooner, there are a lot of helpful listeners and then there are some not-so-good ones. :/

I'm so sorry this happened to you. Some listeners act immaturely if they are at loss for how to respond. I've encountered listeners who are flat-out mean. It sounds like you found someone who was busy with something else.

If you're getting frustrated with someone, don't feel bad about disconnecting when you're a venter. You're not going to hurt their feelings by finding a different listener. The highest priority is making yourself feel better, so don't waste any time with a listener who's not going to listen to you.

I get what you're saying and you're right, for the situation, it was inappropriate. And there's nothing wrong with coming on here when you just need company. Sometimes I get paranoid late at night and can't sleep and everyone I know is asleep so I come on to talk with someone about anything (sometimes problems, sometimes paranoia, occasionally just bullshit).

And when I listen, I do ask questions of people, but the questions I choose to ask are designed to cause that person to think about their own situation in order to work through the problem and come to a decision on their own. I find that if you tell people to do stuff not only are you not in their shoes so you can't make that determination, but they're not as likely to do anything to fix the problem if they don't make that decision for themselves.

So asking them questions that are for the purpose of helping them to verbally think through their problem can be an extremely helpful thing i think. After all, we are listening (probing questions are a part of listening) and not bossing them around. That said, asking questions when you're not paying attention to what's happening isn't gonna get anywhere, so you're absolutely right. Your listener wasn't on top of their game and the questions they were asking were totally off base. I think your other commenters here are on to something about leaving the chat the moment you notice someone isn't paying attention. I'm sorry you're in pain and I do hope that you feel better soon and can get some rest. Take care of you out there.

It happens, not everyone can be the amazing listener that i am. perhaps one day fate will smile down on you and i will be available to listen to you, but for now you're stuck with amateurs.

With that aside, sometimes people are multitasking while listening, which is not a good idea because the venter is obviously there for your attention. Hopefully more people take that under consideration. Also, make sure that if you're listening, you go into it with an active attitude towards doing just that, LISTENING. I think sometimes people get bored and figure they'll just listen/vent to interact with another person; which can be ok sometimes, particularly for a venter, but listener's should be more pro-active about their intentions to help.

I understand totally. I never get why people ask me how I'm able to type with paws. I mean what does it matter when I'm bearing out my soul to them about having just given birth to 10 mutts whose father their probably never going to see again.

Some people ask questions in order to better understand the situation. Many people believe that if you come here as a venter it is because you need to vent. Not because you need company. You weren't venting, and your husband was with you at the time, so if you were on completely good terms with him why was HE not keeping you company? If your husband was not keeping you company it is perfectly reasonable to assume that there is not a perfect relationship.